Song Parodies -> "Still Gay In Heaven?"

Original Song Title:

"Stairway to Heaven"

Original Performer:

"Still Gay In Heaven?"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

While visiting a friend in the hospital, I had a long conversation with an HIV positive man in the waiting room, about his lifestyle, how it started, his thoughts now on his experiences, and if he had any regrets... which left me with some questions.....

There are things I don't know
About gays and les-bos
So I ask...are
They still gay in heaven?

I won't get there so please
What of those on their knees
In the Word those who do
Just become stone

Ooh ooh hoo
So I ask..are
They still gay in heaven?

There's a name on the wall
With a number to call
Cause you know sometimes
Guys have those leanings

In a park off the path
There's a gay bird who thinks
When it's time all his sins
Are forgiven

Ooh, I bet he wonders
Ooh, bet he wonders

Is he healing up yet?
When I asked he confessed
That his body was dying
H-I-V

Once I thought it obscene
Thoughts of blokes on their knees
And the choices of those
Who're partaking

Yeah, it made me wonder
Yeah, it still makes me wonder

If you now whisker poon
And you don't hum the tune
Will your peter still
Fill up with lesions?

A million gay wills drawn
For those now long gone
But the poorest still
Fill up the clinics

Oh woe woe woe

Some of them hustle in the bushes
Are they ashamed now?
Are they just kinky for the gay queen?

Are there still gay baths
You can go to? Is it a wrong turn?
Is it time to take your
Med-i-cine?

Yeah, it makes me wonder
Oh, woe, hoh

Your time is coming
Will you rise up?
Or is it be-low?
Is Satan conning you to loin him?

Dear ladies
Did you join the les-bos?
Do you go low?
Your gay way might
Have me listening in
Doh! oh yeah

And as you rewind all your porn...
You watch it so much that it's torn...
There lies a woman all a-glow
She's dead from HIV we know
Will it affect you when you're old?

So if you read this am I wrong?
Will answers come to me at last?
When all is done and I am gone, huh?
Is it a crock to be so droll?
No? Yeah? No? Yeah? No? Yeah? Oh well...

I'll just ask...are they still gay... in hea-ven?

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Guy - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Absolutely brilliant. Well done Dee. You managed to portray a very sensitive issue while staying completely objective. Lot's of food for thought here and great parody to boot. Very respectable and very five.

Phil Alexander - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

I'll echo what Guy's just said: it would have been easy to fill this with off-colour jokes or homophobic ranting, but I'd say you've done pretty well...

Paul Robinson - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Nicely handled, Dee...5's

alvin rhodes - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

nice tightrope walk...5s

Dee Range - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Guy, Phil, Paul, and alvin, thanks for the nice comments. Much appreciated

Peregrin - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Nothing Deeranged about this parody 'cept the author! 5's !

Johnny D - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Wow...heavy duty...well-written...some deep thoughts here, Dee.

Dee Range - September 06, 2004 - Report this comment

Peregrin and Johnny, thanks

Royce Miller - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment

Dee, I like your parody; I'm pretty sure the flowers won't be sucking the bees in heaven.

Dee Range - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment

Royce, thanks. I agree..heh heh heh

Michael Pacholek - September 07, 2004 - Report this comment

You must work for the postal service, because you're really pushing the envelope. But it was funny as... actually, "Funny as hell" doesn't apply, does it?

Dee Range - September 08, 2004 - Report this comment

M.P., you are right about the envelope, but my transfer to Hawaii was turned down because too many people were getting their mail.. close to eighty percent. No one at the post office ever cracked 50 % before. All joking aside, I know this is a touchy subject (did I actually say that), and I could have made it funnier, but I sympathize with the plight of HIV victims, and didn't want to demean their situation. It's tragic, any way you look at it.

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