There are ticks up your a**,
There are ticks up your a**,
Greasy hair that's lice encrusted and mites,
Please sir would you take a bath?

There ticks are on the wall,
There ticks are on my wall!
Sir your clothes reek like crap and gore,
And those ugly clothes I abhor,

And if the lamb's ticks run rampant in the room,
And if there's a toilet overrun for a spill,
And if your bed explodes with hordes of nasty ticks too,
I'll beat you the dirty pest ridden fool,

There are ticks on my bed,
There are ticks on my bed!
That smell will fade, with a little bleach,
You'll derrange me 'til I'm insane,
Cockroaches on the floor,
I think I saw a flea,
There's something-else in my bed and there's fleas!

And if the clods burst and worms fly out I fear,
You lout and you smell, and grubs in your ear,
And if the land you're in exiles you permanently,
I'll beat you the dirty pest ridden fool.