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Song Parodies -> "Jim, Beam Me Up Last Today"

Original Song Title:

"Bohemian Rhapsody"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Queen

Parody Song Title:

"Jim, Beam Me Up Last Today"

Parody Written by:

Leo Keough

The Lyrics

Is this a real place
Or just some scenery
Shot on a sound stage
No escape from the green I see

Hope in your lives
Hook up to the drive and flee

I'm just an envoy
Sent by the galaxy
Because I boldly go, boldly come
A little shy, little glum
Anyway, this bimbo
Seems to need some chatter from me
From me

Scotty, just stilled a man
Aimed my phaser at his buns
Pulled the trigger, now he's stunned

Scotty, I was having fun
But now I've gone too far, I've gone astray

Scotty, oo-oo-oo-oo
Didn't mean to warp your drive
If I'm not back on board, no time for sorrow
Tarry not, tarry not, (on a) puff of antimatter

Too late, my spine is numb
She's melding with my mind
And she takes her good old time
Goodbye Kirk and Scotty - I've got to stay
Gotta leave me here in time and space to roost

Scotty, oo-oo-oo-oo - (anyway, this bimbo)
I just want what's mine
I sometimes wish I'd never seen porn at all

[Instrumental]

I'm just a little silly shadow of a lamb
Scarycoot, scarycoot, will you do the clamtango
Underclothes and nightie - very scary sight to me

Wannalaya, wannalaya,
Wannalaya, wannalaya,
Wannalaya, figure's so - magnifico

But I'm just an envoy with a red shirt on me
Stuck in a convoy from a far galaxy
Spare me the strife from this mons-travesty

Boldly come, boldly go - will you let me go
This force field! No - it will not let you go - let him go
This force field! It will not let you go - let him go
This force field! It will not let you go - let me go
Will not let you go - let me go (never)
Never let you go - let me go
Never let me go - ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no -

Oh I'm a-reelin', I'm a-kneelin', I'm a-seein' what she shows
Behold her boobs, she's a bimbo of a bride for me
For me
For me

So you think you can clone me and pitch me aside
So you think you can shove me and leap on my pride
Oh lady - stop toyin' with me, lady
Just gotta have clout, not doubt, on this final frontier

Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
Stuff of antimatter
And she's stunning me
Stuff of antimatter - but she's all that matters to me

Anyway, this bimbo...
Security code: YEA

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   15
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 15
 

User Comments

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Mark Scotti - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
WONDERFUL Star Trek Rhapsody. This Scotti says the engine are ready for warp 555!!!!
Spockenberry - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Fantastical tale done verry well!
Christie Marie M - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Beaming up 3 sets of 5's for ya!
Captain Pacholek - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Illogical... but fun!
AFW - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Reading the first two title words, I was thinkin' whiskey...you know, Jim Beam....naughty Trekkie...gotta' love it ! should be a movie like this..
Jonathan S. - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm all out of clever comments, but I must say your Trektacular parody put me in a better mood. 566
Andy Primus - June 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Exactly what AFW said
John Barry - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Simply fantastic!
alvin - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
you had me at 'didn't mean to warp your drive'...great stuff
unKnownVO - June 23, 2009 - Report this comment
. . . she's nobody's child . . . .blame it all on myself, but she's always a Woman to me .
Silver Power - June 25, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm not a big Star Trek fan, but this parody was terrific. 555.
Mark Scotti - June 29, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) I was on this trip before, and it still was a fun ride!!!
Jonathan - June 29, 2009 - Report this comment
544
Guy - July 04, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC05JK)

Leo - One of the better Bo-Rhap parodies I've seen. I have done parody on this OS quite a few times and I can appreciate how you had to deal, and quite well I must add, to some difficult parts of the OS. I am a Trek fan and I must admit that you integrated so much of the original TV series into this parody. Too many great lines to mention - suffice that they are great. You made the writing of this parody seem so effortless - It doesn't appear that it gave you much "tribble".

Q: What did Spock see when he looked in the toilet?
A: The Captain's log.
>BR> Ever notice that no toilets have ever been shown on any Trek series shots or movies? I'm sure that they simply beamed their waste into space. Saves a lot on TP.
Agrimorfee - July 08, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) A BoRhap fan and parody writer here, too...I appreciate the hard work that must have went into this...I didn't get all of it as a casual ST fan, but it does live long and prospers.
bobpiecheese - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC5) I know only the basics of Star Trek (having never seen the show) but I know enough to appreciate this parody. Brilliant job, 555!
Fiddlegirl - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm "stunned", no "Bones" about it... simply brilliant!
Matthias - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
This was pretty awesome I just saw "Star Trek" at the movies like a couple weeks ago and I loved it, I'm not normally a huge Star Trek fan but this was pretty great as was the movie, no matter what the hardcore Trekkies think.
Below Average Dave - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
This was a fun parody. I've not seen the new Star Trek movie, but I am familiar with the original series. Not a title I would have predicted for this song either, just entertaining all around Leo, I enjoyed it.
Red Ant - July 10, 2009 - Report this comment
"Didn't mean to warp your drive" was just one of many gems in here. Lots of BoRhaps here, but this one boldy went where no one had gone before.
Leo Keough - July 10, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks all!!!
I just had a ton of fun writing this one, and I'm so glad you could share my enjoyment!!!

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