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Song Parodies -> "'17 (Ben Carson's NASA)"
Original Song Title:
"'39"
Original Performer:
Queen
Parody Song Title:
"'17 (Ben Carson's NASA)"
Parody Written by:
CarsonTruth
The Lyrics
Ben Carson, as a Seventh-Day Adventist, believes that Ellen White was a prophetess whose visions and writings are on par with Scripture. One of Ellen White's more outlandish "visions" was of the planets Jupiter and Saturn, which she claimed were populated by a race of immortal "tall people", including Enoch, who lived in a society free of sin. This parody takes place in 2017 after Ben Carson has been inaugurated. He announces a NASA mission to send astronauts to Saturn to make contact with the "tall people", much to the chagrin of scientists who point out that the astronauts will have nowhere to land and will be swallowed up in high-pressure gas. Carson, of course, claims that Ellen White couldn't possibly have been wrong, and orders the mission to go ahead. The fate of this small group of astronauts now depends on who was right....
In the year of '17 assembled here the volunteers
In the days when Carson ruled
Here the ship sailed out bound for Saturn far away
Sweetest sight ever seen
So Ben gave the go ahead
Though the scientists all said
That the score brave souls inside
Wouldn't find a place to land, they'd get crushed in pressured gas
And the all would implode as they died
CARSON:
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us rise again
Ellen heard it from God, so I know!
In the year of '17 the spacecraft reached its final home
The volunteers were there to stay
Ben said, "It's good news, they've been taken up to God
'Cause they've stopped sending signals today"
The scientists all shook their heads, looked each other and they said
Someone better alert the press
'Cause his theory wasn't true, all the spacemen got burned up
But he's still spinning it as success
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us rise again
Ellen heard it from God, so I know!"
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us live again"
If they're there
'Cause we're dumb
Pity us
In the days when Carson ruled
Here the ship sailed out bound for Saturn far away
Sweetest sight ever seen
So Ben gave the go ahead
Though the scientists all said
That the score brave souls inside
Wouldn't find a place to land, they'd get crushed in pressured gas
And the all would implode as they died
CARSON:
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us rise again
Ellen heard it from God, so I know!
In the year of '17 the spacecraft reached its final home
The volunteers were there to stay
Ben said, "It's good news, they've been taken up to God
'Cause they've stopped sending signals today"
The scientists all shook their heads, looked each other and they said
Someone better alert the press
'Cause his theory wasn't true, all the spacemen got burned up
But he's still spinning it as success
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us rise again
Ellen heard it from God, so I know!"
"Don't you all believe what the Prophet Ellen said
Saturn's where we need to go
There live tall folks with no sin
Who can help us live again"
If they're there
'Cause we're dumb
Pity us
Find out more facts about Ben Carson and Ellen White here. I don't know how seriously Ben Carson takes all of that stuff. But America deserves to know....
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Voting Breakdown
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| 1 | 5 | 5 | 5 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 5 | 5 | 5 |
User Comments
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How dare you insult Dr. Carson in this way. He is no more offensive than liberal, atheist Democrats or far Right-wing nutjobs that want to ban abortion even in cases of rape or incest!!! He is entitled to his own religious beliefs as long as he doesn't legislate them! NASA would never fund such an absurd mission anyway. The Chinese will probably beat us to Mars!!!
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