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Song Parodies -> "Dungeon Crawling"
Original Song Title:
"London Calling"
(MP3)Original Performer:
The Clash
Parody Song Title:
"Dungeon Crawling"
Parody Written by:
McKludge
The Lyrics
For those who have never played Dungeons and Dragons, a "dungeon crawl" is (per wikipedia) a type of scenario in fantasy role-playing games in which heroes navigate a labyrinthine environment, battling various monsters and looting any treasure they may find.
Dungeon crawling, yeah it’s Saturday night
Ain’t got no girlfriend, but I have a Knight
Dungeon crawling, in our basement keep
We’ll pull an all-nighter, no time for sleep
Dungeon crawling, we’re killing some orcs
Just first level characters, but tenth level dorks
Dungeon crawling yeah we’re itchin’ to fight
Pixies and sprites and some troglodytes
Encountered some spiders, and cleaved them in twain
Hunting down goblins and dealing out the pain
Munchin’ Doritos and drinkin’ some beer
This dungeon we’re looting and we’re all getting richer
Dungeon crawling, as the Thief looks for traps
He moves in silence, but he can’t hide for crap
Dungeon crawling now there’s zombies galore
Tried turning them, but only rolled a 4
Dungeon crawling and the Paladin squeals
I just lost some hit points and I need to be healed
Dungeon crawling, the Cleric starts to cast
We’d better camp soon ‘cause this spell is his last
The Cleric is resting, the Mage meditates
Soon there is growling from monsters at the gate
The Ranger starts firing, but then yells in fear
Some ogres are coming and I’ve emptied my quiver
-- Some 8 hours later --
The DM* is yawning; my Knight has died twice
And the damn Cleric won’t stop rolling his dice
We’re all getting hungry, almost out of beer
But I called for pizza and they soon will deliver
(Food food food food!)
(Food food food!)
Just kill it!
Dungeon crawling; and we’re almost done
We have played for 12 hours, and most of it was fun
Dungeon crawling now we’ve killed the last foe
The sun has come up; we should all hit the road
Dungeon crawling
Hey, somebody stole my dice (my dice my dice)
Ain’t got no girlfriend, but I have a Knight
Dungeon crawling, in our basement keep
We’ll pull an all-nighter, no time for sleep
Dungeon crawling, we’re killing some orcs
Just first level characters, but tenth level dorks
Dungeon crawling yeah we’re itchin’ to fight
Pixies and sprites and some troglodytes
Encountered some spiders, and cleaved them in twain
Hunting down goblins and dealing out the pain
Munchin’ Doritos and drinkin’ some beer
This dungeon we’re looting and we’re all getting richer
Dungeon crawling, as the Thief looks for traps
He moves in silence, but he can’t hide for crap
Dungeon crawling now there’s zombies galore
Tried turning them, but only rolled a 4
Dungeon crawling and the Paladin squeals
I just lost some hit points and I need to be healed
Dungeon crawling, the Cleric starts to cast
We’d better camp soon ‘cause this spell is his last
The Cleric is resting, the Mage meditates
Soon there is growling from monsters at the gate
The Ranger starts firing, but then yells in fear
Some ogres are coming and I’ve emptied my quiver
-- Some 8 hours later --
The DM* is yawning; my Knight has died twice
And the damn Cleric won’t stop rolling his dice
We’re all getting hungry, almost out of beer
But I called for pizza and they soon will deliver
(Food food food food!)
(Food food food!)
Just kill it!
Dungeon crawling; and we’re almost done
We have played for 12 hours, and most of it was fun
Dungeon crawling now we’ve killed the last foe
The sun has come up; we should all hit the road
Dungeon crawling
Hey, somebody stole my dice (my dice my dice)
* DM stands for Dungeon Master, but for the parody, say it "Dee-Em"
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Voting Breakdown
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| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 10 | 10 |
User Comments
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555 XP for this fine parody.
It's like you've studied my childhood and stuck it into this parody (my teenagehood and adulthood as welll actually). I got a kick out of the specifics that you put into this parody (such as I just lost some hit points and I need to be healed/ Dungeon crawling, the Cleric starts to cast/ We’d better camp soon ‘cause this spell is his last) only a true dork who has played the game knows this much about DND
Oh, Lord oDunedinMaster~ clasp me to your big Diesel Chest, & whisk me away in derBatmobile, flying high through the Clearwater night . . . where lies your BatCAVE, for a bit o'play, OK ?
Fantastic stuff - in both senses of the word "fantastic". Definitely one of those "why didn't I think of that?" ideas.
Never played D&D and after reading your parody, still don't want to. But your parody was entertaining nonetheless, I think you rolled 5-5-5.
Susanna - I killed all those monsters and only got 555XP? It's gonna take forever to go up a level.
Matthias - Yes, I once was that dork. I have since stepped up to geek.
LCC - Um, thanks? I think that is the strangest comment I've ever received.
Phil - Once the title sub came to me, I bashed it out in a couple of hours. What's that they say, "Write what you know?"
blackjack21 - I haven't played D&D in probably 15 years, but it was fun at the time. Of course, it all depends on how creative your DM is.
Matthias - Yes, I once was that dork. I have since stepped up to geek.
LCC - Um, thanks? I think that is the strangest comment I've ever received.
Phil - Once the title sub came to me, I bashed it out in a couple of hours. What's that they say, "Write what you know?"
blackjack21 - I haven't played D&D in probably 15 years, but it was fun at the time. Of course, it all depends on how creative your DM is.
I wonder if Strummer played D&D. Thanks for recalling both memories of long nights of 20 sided die and listening to the Clash in college.
Warren -As a punk rock star, Joe was WAY too cool and too busy getting laid to have played D&D.
This reminds me so much of Elder Scrolls: Oblivion on my PS3. Great title switch and parody! 555
DJ - Dungeon Crawl can apply to computer RPGs, too.
No Munchkins!
No Munchkins!
Awesome job McKludge, I used to be a D&D fanatic months...I mean years ago :) And like DJ Blaze, I've been hooked on Oblivion as well.
Jeff - Thanks. Oblivion was pretty good. Right now I'm hooked on Dragon Age: Origins.
McKludge, Dragon Age is good? I've seen the commercials. It looks nice. Might have to try it.
If you liked the older Baldur's Gate games, you'll like Dragon Age. I've been waiting for a good RPG that wasn't online multiplayer like WoW or crazy action like Gods of War.
It's also difficult. If you are used to simply charging into battle and wiping the floor with the bad guys, you will die quickly in this game. Tactics are very important.
It's also difficult. If you are used to simply charging into battle and wiping the floor with the bad guys, you will die quickly in this game. Tactics are very important.
Thanks...I've actually played very few RPGs (Morrowind and Oblivion) and none of the online multiplayer games. I bought it last night so I'm looking forward to it this weekend.
Lord McLEWD , ~Le Marquis de Qluelessness~ careful, Sir, T'would be a shame to see you 'die quickly' . . . .
Thanks, milady. If I'm gonna die, I'd rather it be quick. Not soon, but quick.
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