All alone at the end of the evening
When the horny has turned my balls blue
I was thinking 'bout the last time that I got any
I'm long over-due
You know I've always been a weirdo
(My kinks would freak you out)
And it's so hard to change
(Can't seem to go without)
But my fantasies lately
Even creep me out, without a doubt,
I'm out and out ashamed

I'm putting on some Jergen's
While inside my mind
I'm naked with a midget one more time

You can spend your time slathered in honey
You can have it licked off by a mime
Though it may sound a little bizarro
Should it be a crime?

And when you're shouting out your safe word
(Nobody seems to hear)
And it's gone too hardcore
(Can't stick it *anywhere*)
When your holes are all receivin'
Still you're coming back, you're running back
You're coming back for more

So keep this on the downlow
And don't share this rhyme
I'm naked with a midget one more time

Naked with a midget
Naked with a midget
Naked with a midget and a mime

Naked with a midget
Naked with a midget
Naked with a gadget up my hind

(repeat and fade)