Song Parodies -> "Holiday Temp Jobs"

Original Song Title:

"The Dirty Jobs"

Original Performer:

"Holiday Temp Jobs"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

I am the man who just stands there and rings
Salvation Army bells throughout the day
It feels good to think of charity things
But a migraine is on the way

It's my temp job now
I'm working downtown
Still feeling a bit underpaid
My legs freezing, and I'm sneezing
I'm not gonna take this job again

I am a man who plays as Santa's elf
The parents are jerks, but the kids just make my day
They're whiny, and shriek, and often wet theirself
Noses runny, and they all kick me 'til I'm lame

It's my temp job now
I'm working downtown
Still feeling a bit underpaid
And I'm thinking
Santa's been drinking!
I'm not gonna let him sleep again!

Manager tells me I've been rude again
If they can't find the ramen noodles
I'm not the one to blame!
I should take a cashier lane
My bunions feel inflamed

We're only human
We're not asking for much
Just trying to earn some dollars for our Christmas night
We are beguiled, but we also have our dreams
We are pissed off, we need some spirits bright!

It's our temp job now
We're working downtown
Still feeling a bit underpaid
Well for Pete's sake!
That's all for lunch break
Guess I gotta work the street again
Gotta shovel the street again...

[SOUND EFFECTS OF PUSHY SHOPPERS AT MACY'S, OR ANY OTHER FINE DEPARTMENT STORE...]

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Stan Hall - December 08, 2008 - Report this comment

Bleakly funny. At least Santa here didn't have to -- at least, doesn't complain of having to -- endure Mr. Sawyer's amateur psychologizing. :-)

UnKnownVotress - December 08, 2008 - Report this comment

Lord Agree, how about the sound of the Not-So-Fine WalMART choppers ? ?

Agrimorfee - December 08, 2008 - Report this comment

Mrs. ClausVoteress: That is kind of summed up in the stanza with "Manager tells me I'm rude again..." :)

LilCouClaws - December 08, 2008 - Report this comment

MsClaws thanks you for the explanation, Lord Agree .

Below Average Dave - December 08, 2008 - Report this comment

As numerous recent parodies by me may convey, I can relate to this parody. I'm not a huge fan of TOS, so parodies of it naturally are an improvement, very well done.

Christie Marie M - December 20, 2008 - Report this comment

I've been temping jobs my whole life and I have a hard time trying to find full-time, permanent jobs! Maybe I should go back to school and study nursing because I got a family to support (my mother who is a nurse, my retired father, and my brother who works 2 days a week at a nursing home as a nurse). I want my mom to retire badly. Having a learning disorder is also keeping me from getting accepted at jobs, too. Anywho, great parody you wrote! I love it. Here's a paycheck of $555!

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