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Song Parodies -> "Eisley's Cantina"
Original Song Title:
"Candida"
Original Performer:
Tony Orlando and Dawn
Parody Song Title:
"Eisley's Cantina"
Parody Written by:
The Comedian
The Lyrics
( instrumental intro )
The storm troopers shout
'Cause they know that you're about
But they couldn't catch the glow
Of your eyes
And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
Tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds
Eisley's Cantina!
See who'll take us together!
The further from this world the better!
Where they dare to wrestle free
Eisley's Cantina!
Must pay some man who will lead us!
Imperials won't impede us!
Since the Princess called to me
Now some-thing's amiss
Kenobi never looked like this
Said he felt disturbing mayhem
In the spacetime
Slowed down, from hyper-drive
As an asteroid went by
And Alderaan was gone --- none left a-live!
Eisley's Cantina!
Freaks who'd bake us with blasters!
A hundred impending disasters!
Must take care, it's time to leave!
Eisley's Cantina!
Han Solo blasted in the gut
That loan shark from
Jab-ba The Hutt!
Thug is dead though no one grieves
( -- instrumental -- )
And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
You know I'm tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds!
Eisley's Cantina!
R-2's got the Death-Star plans!
Blockade runner Han Solo's our man!
Brags of Kes-sel run-ning speed!
(running speed ---
--- running speed ) Eisley's Cantina!
Take off now Fal-con, trans-port us!
Hare-ship
to
Darth Vader's
Tortoise!
'Cause Luke's sister called to me
( repeat to fade )
The storm troopers shout
'Cause they know that you're about
But they couldn't catch the glow
Of your eyes
And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
Tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds
Eisley's Cantina!
See who'll take us together!
The further from this world the better!
Where they dare to wrestle free
Eisley's Cantina!
Must pay some man who will lead us!
Imperials won't impede us!
Since the Princess called to me
Now some-thing's amiss
Kenobi never looked like this
Said he felt disturbing mayhem
In the spacetime
Slowed down, from hyper-drive
As an asteroid went by
And Alderaan was gone --- none left a-live!
Eisley's Cantina!
Freaks who'd bake us with blasters!
A hundred impending disasters!
Must take care, it's time to leave!
Eisley's Cantina!
Han Solo blasted in the gut
That loan shark from
Jab-ba The Hutt!
Thug is dead though no one grieves
( -- instrumental -- )
And oh,
Who am I ?
Just an old wary Jedi
You know I'm tryin' hard to trick these
Jerks' minds!
Eisley's Cantina!
R-2's got the Death-Star plans!
Blockade runner Han Solo's our man!
Brags of Kes-sel run-ning speed!
(running speed ---
--- running speed ) Eisley's Cantina!
Take off now Fal-con, trans-port us!
Hare-ship
to
Darth Vader's
Tortoise!
'Cause Luke's sister called to me
( repeat to fade )
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User Comments
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I really had to dredge the memory banks for the original tune (no sound card on this machine). This was fun! 555
5s just for giving me the chance to hear that horrible OS again JD - rolled gold 70s rhythms there! - DK much about Star Wars but automatic 555 for you, mate
great job...i felt like i was THERE
555, very good. Brings back Star Wars memories.
Thanks Ravyn, Stuart, alvin, and Stephen.
Like Stuart, I'm not into SW...but a clever write, nonetheless
Thank you, AFW.
Also not into Star Wars, but still liked it, very amusing
Thanks, Larry.
Five credits should allow you to avoid any... Imperial entanglements.
Belated thanks, Michael Pacholekwalker.
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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