Woke up this morning, an odd taste in my mouth, and
Then I realized we were due to head south,
Warm U.S. cottage, with dual-cit. spouse,
I hope they won’t keep me out.

Hey, DHS-man, I hate to even ask, I’d
Like to stay the max.
Hey, DHS-man, won’t you please let me in for 6 months.

Hey, Mister Inquisitor, I’m just a snowbird-visitor,
I’m sure that I am not the only one;
I’ve sent “Closer Connection”-form, in IRS’s direction, for
I plan to live and die a native son.

You’ll find no trace of felony, of villainy or zealotry
I’m not the sort who plans to overstay.
ISIS I repudiate, I file my taxes never late,
In fact I’m on good terms with CRA.

I don’t drink Starbuck’s, just Tim Horton’s Sir,
Always a donut on the side,
I take my hockey gear everywhere I walk,
I’m myself, a trailer-park Canuck. Whoa-.

–oh, Not some alien: visiting Canadian
A Canadian with his puck. Whoa
–oh, Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some
A Canadian with his puck.

If music makes the man, and threats you rate,
Then I’m the zero of the day,
I’ll play my Lightfoot, Twain, Dion and Stompin’ Tom,
BNL, Avril , Biebs and Buble.

I’ll trade my “loonies” at your banks to shop,
I won’t take anybody’s job.
I’ll hide my views on climate-change and gun-control,
And no one should take me for a snob. Say

Eh! Not some alien: passported Canadian
A Canadian with his puck. Say
Eh! Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some
A Canadian with his puck.

Hey, DHS-man, I know the rules can change
I won’t do anything strange.
Hey, DHS-man, won’t you please let me in for a while.

Say, Eh! Not some alien: visiting Canadian
A Canadian with his puck. Say
Eh! Not some alien: ally, friend, and then some
A Canadian with his puck.