All the chapters in this real long book
it's a hundred if you blink.
Whoa-hoh, every time you try to take a look
it may just drive you to drink.
It ain't romances. Just take your chances.
Dante's the guy.

You just finished chapter twenty-nine.
Seventy-one to complete.
Whoa-hoh, medieval book taxes your mind.
Late at night, and now you're beat.
Such slow advances. Just take your chances.
Dante's the guy.

Mmmm, you can say this "comedy" is only make-believe
and tell me that there ain't no real hell-fire.
But you are still a victim of the novels that you read.
As sure as in the end, you will get high-yi-yigher.

Now, I see, you're catching lots of hell.
First of trilogy's complete.
Whoa-hoh, fool them all, but, baby, I can tell
Satan's got corns on his feet.
You look at Judas, Cassius and Brutus.
Dante's the guy.

(instrumental break)

Yesterday, purgatory seemed mild.
Now, read 'bout heaven today.
Whoa-hoh, do you like the book's translation style?
Italiano, not Francais!
Pretentious stances. You took your chances.
Dante's the guy.

Dante's the guy.