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Song Parodies -> "I'm Not Schmoopie"

Original Song Title:

"I Want Candy"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bow Wow Wow

Parody Song Title:

"I'm Not Schmoopie"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Reuben

The Lyrics

When my workmate is on the phone
Wish he'd save that stuff for home
Don't wanna hear sex talk with his wife
Wish he'd go and get a life

I'm not schmoopie!
I'm not schmoopie!

Don't need to know how much she's been missed
Ain't no need for slurpee kisses
My poor eyes, they're in need of some rest
Saw you lick my phone and drool on my desk

I'm not schmoopie!
I'm not schmoopie!

"Wuv you sweetie wife, my punkin", you said
Overheard your dreams and your fantasies in bed.
Using my phone all the time
I wish you'd use a different line

I'm not schmoopie!
I'm not schmoopie!
Jeff Reuben Website
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2
Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 2   2
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   9
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User Comments

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Arwen - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Love it, Jeff!! You know, I can TOTALLY relate!!
Ashkicksass - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
I love it too Jeff! I can't totally relate, but I sit by two women in their 50's who insist upon talking baby talk at every possible opportunity. Which is one of my biggest pet peeves. So I can sort of relate...
Lee O'Shea - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Oh, come off it, you know damn well your wife calls up her "widdle Jeffy-weffy snuggle-puss" 20 times a day to make sure he knows "Mommy wuvs him". And you know you wuv it. But nice job feigning annoyance with those types.
Jeff Reuben - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Arwen: Your life is inspiring, what can I say? Ash: Baby talk like talking about newborns, or just old people talking like babies? Lee: That's why they put me in an office =P
Stuart McArthur - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
"Don't wanna hear sex talk with his wife" isn't a blanket rule with me, but very much dependent on the wife's appeal - hate schmoopie too, Jeff, except maybe with newborns, when I'll let you off the hook - 555
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Schmashing.
Kristof Robertson - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Ahhh Jeffikins, dat was vewy cutsie-pootsie! You want some fivey-wiveys??
Michael Pacholek - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
George and Elaine will no doubt agree with me in giving you fives.
Arwen - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Sweetie, every time I see this song, I start singing it to "Hang On, Sloopy." =) Just thought you should know...

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