Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "5 to 9"

Original Song Title:

"9 to 5"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Dolly Parton

Parody Song Title:

"5 to 9"

Parody Written by:

Dan Creeden

The Lyrics

The Theme Song for the NEW (Un) Official Holiday in America.
Stumble out of the door
From leftover turkey dinner
I face a blast of Thanksgiving weather
Getting in my car to drive into the dead of night
Then pull into the mall lot
Before the crack of dawn
Setting up my pup tent and start to yawn
Counting down till I get to shop 5 to 9

Shopping 5 to 9
On the way to grab a bargain
Standing in those lines
While I’m stretching and a yawning
Rushing through the doors
In a retail frenzy stampede
Yelling ” Outta My Way,
That Doorbuster’s Meant for ME!!! “

5 to 9, it’s about personal possessions
Fighting all the crowds
A shopper’s obsession
Being first in line
Shows a sense of discount dominance
Even though it may look like we have no common sense

Racing down the isles
In a retail frantic
Fearing I’d miss deals
Puts me in a panic
Knocking people over with my shopping cart
All as a result
Of a lack of sleep
As I swarm to all the specials
That are knee-deep
Welcome to the official day where Christmas starts

Shopping 5 to 9
It pays to shop those early hours
With the discount pricing
It gives consumers all the power
Stacking coupons to
The prices that we see
Sometimes when I’m done
I get the merchandise free

5 to 9
Before the morning sunrise
It’s not for the weak
Cause most of them don’t survive
Takes a different breed
To handle all the stress
Excuse me right now
I’ve got my eye on that dress

5 to 9
Is when I gobble up the sales
Hitting every store in
The Tri-County area without fail
Buying all the things
Cheap on every Black Friday
Then going right home
And selling them high on E Bay

5 to 9
5 to 9

Fade Out

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 1
 1
 
 5   11
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/80s/dollyparton9.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 2519