Oh Devito, We've been told,
you'll be on the t.v. playing "someone old"
you are smaller than an anal probe
and I've had one so I should know

Oh that Taxi show is gone,
twenty years it took to get another one
with lines I'm sure we've heard somewhere
from that silly plot line showing there..

Oh Devito, you will never know,
more success on t.v. shows,
I'll never see how bad it is to watch you,
I'll just flip my remote and go
your career is on the other side
that's the down and not the up one, mind
sending taxis was a better show
Devito, why don't you go???

do you ever read the news?
in your elevator fitted shoes?
the series outlook now is dire,
Devito, we need stars, all right?

and when it's done this time,
neilson ratings do you in,
please feel free to make the choice
hands across your chest, career should end..

Oh Devito, you will never know,
more success on t.v. shows,
I'll never see how bad it is to watch you,
I'll just flip my remote and go
your career is on the other side
that's the down and not the up one, mind
sending taxis was a better show
Devito, why don't you go???