Who cannot be minors any more?
Hey, hey those kids are quite a score
I used to watch them late at night
I'd fantasize, but it just wasn't right
They're all grown up and they're legal now
Now today, one look and "Holy Cow!"
Someday, gonna make them mine
Olsen twins-they're looking mighty fine

Two are eighteen now
They're both eighteen now
Rolling in green now
Tight in their jeans now

Who can it be in the magazines
It looks like-it is those double teens
We now cheer they've grown this old
I can't wait, until the centerfold
They've made some films that I could not stand
But I might buy if they make the three-X brand
I'm glad to see that long childhood end
Here they come, out to reel in men

Two are eighteen now
They're both eighteen now
Rolling in green now
One's looking lean now

Is it my fault that they blow me away?
Why do they torture me?
It's not just "Full House" that I can see
It's also fantasy

Oh, Two are eighteen now!
Oh, Can't stand it, Can't stand it
Yeah yeah yeah
Hubba hubba