TOUCAN, THAT BEAK, WOW!

What is that thing in this weird pet store?
Looks like a bird- but so much more
Has a nose bigger than his ass
How does that neck support that giant mass?
How the hell did that damn thing grow?
Oy Vey! Like that Pinnochio
It's huge, he is far more blessed
Than Pete T.—or maybe Barbra S.

Toucan, that beak, wow!
Toucan, that beak, wow!
Toucan, that beak, wow!
Scare off the meek, now

When that bird walks, you can see he stoops
Thing like that just might sell Fruit Loops
I don't see --how he can fly
I were him—I wouldn't even try
And as for chicks, he should mail it in
Except perhaps, they might be as bad as him
Who buys that thing to keep as a pet?
The cats run, the dogs get upset

Toucan, that beak, wow!
Toucan, that beak, Wow!
Toucan, that beak, WOW!
Avian freak, now

Is it a joke Mother Nature has played?
How does it swallow food?
I think that poor creature should have sued
Such an unbalanced dude

Oh, Toucan, that beak, wow!
Oh, Toucan, that, Toucan that,
Haw, haw, haw......