So restless, I could see across the room
Our praised host doling out the food from his kitchen
"Monsieur", he brayed and prayed that I would be his best friend
To taste one bite of salsa he purchased

"Oh well, oh well," I said, "Let's give a test"
I plucked one off the tray while I just smugly smiled in jest
But soon I was wired, "My mouth's on fire!"
I screamed as I drank down a gallon of water
Without a thought to the temperature
My tongue received a bad seizure

One chip! I thought I'd had them all
In every shape and flavor called
I thought they would be lightly seasoned
With the spiciness I'd like
What do you know? It was jalapeno
That burned my tastebuds off that night

Listen bub, I'm not a member of an S&M club
We have much different tastes, in terms of enjoying all our grub
You keep your hot spice and peppers seeds alone
I'll eat my chow and still have fun
In a much blander zone

"Burnt lip!" And I ran down the hall
I still can't taste my food at all
An inordinate amount of seasonings
Alit on my tongue that night
A big regret that I won't forget
I'll feel more safe with foods more light