Eddie wanted to impress all the crew
He wrote a great speech and rehearsed it through
He polished and corrected till he was blue
Promotion he was hopin'

The meeting was in place and the Prez was there
The whole room was full, was not an empty chair
The company stars were at this posh affair
Was time for his moment

He had his fly wide open
When he stood up to speak
Walked up with fly wide open
And everyone got a peek

"The problem" said Ed, "is expand we must!"
"We need to open up, make a forward thrust"
He felt the silence there, then he felt a gust
Then down came the laughter

He moved his jacket down at a new angle
He tried to zip it up, but couldn't wrangle
By the time he was done, he had just caused mangle
A suture would be needed

He had his fly wide open
When he stood up to speak
Limped out with fly wide open
I think he's now sprung a leak