Shake Me Off- After You Go Bro!
(schlocapella by Enis da Penis)
~

Jiggle-tug!
Jiggle-tug!
Jiggle-tug!
Wiggle slug!

I’ll put the boom-boom back in your bed
If you treat me right when this lizard ‘gets bled’
Jiggle me into that trough
‘Cause there’s no bang-bang if you don’t dry me off
A ‘wet-head’ burns me
It just ain’t right
My best friend, you, let me down last night
Left me soggy, chapped n’ red
Drippin’, flippin’—what’s the deal with you and heads?!

Chorus:
Shake me off—after you go, Bro
Or I’m drainin’ on your brand new cholos
Shake me off—after you go Bro
Then be so careful when you zip that fly!

Shake wee ‘Hoff’—after you go, Bro
And then spritz me with a little Polo
Take me boff-ing down in Soho
We’ll go lancing tonight
I wanna hit that thigh! (Yeah, yeah, baby!)

You got me dreamin’ bout south of France
Where there ain’t no shame and we don’t need no pants
I’d be wavin’ free in the breeze
Sportin’ SPF’s—but no STD’s!

Hell, I’m your wingman, don’t be cru-el
It makes me crazy when *you* act the tool!
Stand-up members of a crew
Help each other—we won’t need no pills of blue!

Chorus:
Shake me off—after you go, Bro
This Chewbaca likes it done ‘Hand Solo’
Quake n’ doff—‘til there’s no flow, Joe
And don’t worry what ‘8 shakes’ imply!

Man, I’m stuck between two ho-hos
And an inch‘r two in front of po-po
If you want a happy Frodo
Help your Hobbit stay dry-aye!
And help support my high! (Yeah, yeah, baby!)

(Jiggle-tug!)
(Jiggle-tug!)

Cuddle up, baby, move in ti-ight
We’ll go lancing tomorrow night
It’s cold out there, but it’s warm in bed
Let others ‘lance’—we’ll so-lo at home instead!

(Jiggle-tug!)

Shake me off—after you go, Joe
Or I’m takin’ back my frickin’ mojo
Shake me off—contendre nolo
And I’ll help you sew your wild rye!

Shake me off—after you go, Bro
If you have to, whip me like a yo-yo
Snake de-quaff—to not’s a no no
Take me lancing tonight….

(Boom-boom-boom!)