Dum, dum, dum, Honey, what's that noise?
Dum, dum, dum it's the sound of my gun.
Dum, dum, dum, honey just whats that noise?
Dum, dum, dum it's the sound

Ralphie's got a gun
Ralphie's got a gun
On frozen pole no tongues
He'll just shoot your eye right out son
It was his favorite toy
He's no longer a boy
They said when the next year came,Scut Farkus just ran off like a train
But man, he had it comin' Now that Ralphie's got a gun, Scut Farkus is now his game

Ralphie's got a gun
Ralphie's got a gun
He says more than "Oh fudge"
Only now it actually isnt fudge
Tell ya now, yeah it's true
Watch out and he'll stun you
He cocked and shot out all the BBs
Ralphie Parker has just now gone insane
He cussed and yelled at somebody than he chased them and then shot someone, they ran away

Run away, run away from Ralphie Parker yeah yeah yeah
Run awau, run away from Ralphie yie yie yie yie yie yie yeah

Ralphie's got a gun
Parker's on the run
He just shoots in the sun
All day, everybody's on the run
No Lifeboy soap will do
He'll shoot your E.Y.E.
He's got his hitmen , Schwartz and Flick and his little brother Randy
He said "All in a circle, round the pole freeze your tongues, I triple dog dare you,no I QUADRUPLE DOG dare you"
Triple dog darin you for tongue pain yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah
His dad's lamp,this leg lamp is frag-eee-yee-yee-lay-yay-yay-yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

Ralphie's got a gun
Ralphie's got a gun
Ralphie's got a gun
Ralph Parker he's on the run

Ralphie's got a gun
The neighbor's dogs they run
Shoots pink bunnies before they run
I gotta use this here pun
He'll shoot your eye out
Had to go use that pun

Ralphie Parker and his men have fun
Ralphie's got a gun