There's something wrong with your car again
You add it to the list
Something clanks underneath

Unseemly sounds, like a hurricane
And tremors up your wrists
It's nowhere near discreet

Yikes!
You're patching it with Scotch
Patching it with Scotch
Patching it with Scotch
Patching it with Scotch

When something's wrong there is Gaffer Tape
The hub caps on the rim
You fix them on the fly

If you can save a fried brake
And a dollar on a skim
You'll fist the DMV and scrape on by

You're patching it with Scotch
(You can save yourself from hauling)
Patching it with Scotch
(You can drive your car awol)
Patching it with Scotch
(You can duct out of the crawling)
Patching it with Scotch

Get your car to roll into a service station's
commendation of gyration
They'll give it to you
The snuff and spittle tells them that the core's appalling
But they rather help you than the cops a-trawling
And they'll send
You back out there my friend
From bend to bend to bend to bend

Save your moolah up for an inebriation
Tube ligation sustenation
Will get you unscrewed
The liquor bottle sold to you looks more appealing
As you start to wobble and your soul's freewheeling
Save on dents
And gone green presidents
You'll spend and spend and spend and spend

The winding road surface' underway
And every fall-out turns you glum
But you can save a buck
If you're a clusterfuck
With teeth a-clattering on hold with gum

Patch it all with Scotch
(You're a menace in a clunker)
Patch it all with Scotch
(You're hotwired and a drunk)
Patch it all with Scotch
(In the slammer cops should dump your)
Patched up ass with Scotch

Patching it with Scotch
(You have duct yourself)
(You have tucked yourself)
Patching it with Scotch
(Clusterfucked yourself that ball)

Patching it with Scotch
(Had the dough to pay)
(To get towed away)
Patching it with Scotch
(Once you oiled yourself)
(Soon you'll soil yourself)
Patching it with Scotch
(Climb yourself out of that hole)
Patching it with Scotch