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Song Parodies -> "Open Robe"

Original Song Title:

"On The Open Road"

Original Performer:

A Goofy Movie

Parody Song Title:

"Open Robe"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

People will sell anything to make a buch. Here's the Original Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhaxX_kfFA4
(Whistling)

(Salesman)
Do you need a break from bunched up privates?
Do you long to feel the air flow?
The decency law
Is so uptight
Will you my friend
Help make it right
And gather a set of open robes

“Y’all don’t need panties!!!!”
“Ah-yuk!!!”

(Customer)
I’m appalled! At what you are expectin’
I’m appalled! I think I might “explode”

(Salesman)
“Yeah!!!”

(Customer)
The store-clerk here’s a freaking putz
Because he just wants to see my nuts
Correct me? Inside this open robe?

(Salesman)
Your ‘nads look like they’re sweating
Do Paris Hilton role-play
And thrust your lap right out of pantaloons

(Customer)
Salesman you must be crazy
My junk I won’t portray
It’s not a main attraction if I do

(Salesman)
Read the facts
“America’s a prude place”

(Customer)
It’s worse than midget pornography

(Salesman)
Come on buddy buy these kinda robes

(Customer)
You’re so mad
I think you’re licking toads

(Salesman)
When I see her spread legs, I think buy

(Customer)
You know that’s funny… I think “high”!

(Both)
Just paying for “Britney’s Open Robe”

[The rest of the store pitches in]

(Teenaged girl working the counter)
Sexy buys
Will give your gal, a flash thrill

(Over-Powerful Janitor)
Purchase pack
I’m sure you’d like to show

(A married male customer)
I’m in no hurry to go try
Cause I’ll be turning 65
The next time wife needs the open robe

(Newlywed Man)
For a week of in-bed sex fixation

(Newlywed Woman)
“Yeah!”

(Newlywed Man)
With the bondage cattle-prodding show

(Customer)
Holy crap!

(Mickey Mouse)
Cause Minnie Mouse is full of lust

(Co-Ed Pervert)
I’m buying twelve bags
It’s a must
From now on I wear the open robe

(Salesman)
I’m sure wife will be happy
When she sees your hot rear

(Fab Five)
You’re right about the rear thing, we should know

(Store)
They know!!!

(Customer)
Don’t want to sound too snappy
But… GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!
I'll burn down this place and shoot you with a bow!!!

(Chorus with Salesman)
Like a pirate you got some buried treasure
You will find they wear ‘em round the globe
Just pick one up. What can it hurt?

(Customer)
I just bought Janet Jackson's shirt!!!

(Salesman)
The babes all cling to me
Since Dick Van Dyke is free
If you know what I mean…
Buy the OPEN ROBE!!!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   10
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - April 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Since Youtube is damn annoying and got rid of the above link. Here it is again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RaEjcRXQb-c (This one works!!! For now!!!)
Rex - April 22, 2007 - Report this comment
I always suspected that about Minnie...loved the Janet Jackson shirt line too.
TJC - April 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Very clever stuff here, Matthias (worse than midget pornography just one of my favs!)
Ann Hammond - April 22, 2007 - Report this comment
he he
Guy - March 08, 2008 - Report this comment
ABC4-O) Matt - Must say this is one really good "Car-Tune". Impressive and funny. Well done, sir.
UnKnownVotress - March 08, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir, please try a 'toga' !
Agrimorfee - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artistry) You seem to have a penchant for Retail Store Parodies. This was a lot of fun on a song I have never heard before, and probably never would have thanks to you. :) Some parts didn't make sense, but what did it matter! :D Cool consistency of characters voices for the various parts.
Invisible Boy - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
When I first saw your title, I thought it was an X rated Harry Potter theme to the OS "Open Arms". I know this OS and we actually have the movie here somewhere. It was very original to parody a song from the Goofy Movie and I enjoyed the varied cast members. (no...not their "members")
stuart mcarthur - March 18, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) as a piece of research on celebrity open robe incidents, this is unsurpassed, matthias, tainted only by the fact that I now have an image of midget pornography (that I never knew existed) in my head, which might leave an indelible scar - 555
Jack Wilson - March 19, 2008 - Report this comment
This was awesome! 5s
Kristof Robertson - March 19, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4O) Superbly smutty....loved the cast of characters and the raunchy wit. 555
Jeff Reuben - March 19, 2008 - Report this comment
I'd thought that this might be Open Arms by Journey. Well done, the title made me laugh, and the song went well!

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