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Song Parodies -> "Billy Ray's Movie Theme Tunes, No. 1: Titanic"

Original Song Title:

"Achy Breaky Heart"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Ray Cyrus

Parody Song Title:

"Billy Ray's Movie Theme Tunes, No. 1: Titanic"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

I've always thought that film directors have thrown away a great opportunity...to employ possibly the greatest songwriter the world has known. Part 1 of a series. James Cameron; I hope you're reading this....
Nineteen hundred twelveI'm trav-llin' by myself
On this big ol' tub they said cain't sink
But now I've just been toldwe've de-veloped a "hole"
And in an hour we'll be in the drink

You can tell I'm p***edcoz my "new buddies" list
It's a-gittin' shorter purdy fast
I'm gonna find the jerk...who didn't spot the 'berg
And kick his partly-submerged little ass!

Stuck on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
I jist don't think we'll see dry land
I really hate this boatthis stinky sinky boat
And I cain't stand that dang string band..oooh!

[INSTRUMENTAL, during which]
"It's a string QUARTET, Mr Cyrus"
"Quart of WHUT? Man, I HATE Boats! If I make it, I'm gonna stick to ZEPPELINS from now onthat there Hindenberg's nice and sturdy."

Lips are turnin' bluemy testicles are too
So there won't be no lovin', aft or stern
The ceiling's on the floorthere's lotsa moist décor
And darn! The fare I bought was a "return"

Though we'll end up fer sureon the Atlantic floor
Some folks are beggin' favours from the Lord
I asked the guy upstairsto answer all my prayers
But, sadly, Celine Dion ain't on board

(It) sucks on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
The toffs in first class sure ain't nice
I'm drinkin' on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
And now my bourbon comes with iceoooh!

[ANOTHER INSTRUMENTAL"hey, you jist CAIN'T get enough gee-tar twangin'!"]

Stuck on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
And I cain't light my cigarette
It's soggy on this boatthis stinky sink boat
HOORAY! We just lost the quartet!

Stuck on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
My cowboy boots are gittin' wet
But I'll stay on this boatthis stinky sinky boat
Coz I might score with Kate Wins-letooooh!


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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   13
 13
 13
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rick C - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Chock full of rioutous line. This parody certainly doesn't leave you with a sinking feeling. Parody genius at work here. 555+++
alvin rhodes - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
my other fave of the day....you're on fire
Meriadoc - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Kristof, you are a parody master!
Arwen - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Moist decor! LOL! (actually the whole thing is great, but that just REALLY got me!) Excellent idea, KR!
AFW - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Loved that "Stinky Sinky" line...This sinks to the superb...should be a lotta' belly laughs, down there for Davey Jones
Matthias - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Berg! Baby Berg! Cruise Line Inferno!!!!
Stuart McArthur - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
whoa, now you are ONTO something, Kristof - what a great idea, movie synapses to Achy Breaky Heart (gee, can I have a go?) - the idea's as brilliant as the parodies - loved the last line esp. - 555
TJC - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Just great... too many great lines to quote but really top notch pacing (ie, there will be no Unsingable Molly Brown references) and hilarious to boat, er boot!
Kristof Robertson - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
My heartfelt thanks to Rick, Al, Merry, Arwen, Matthias, Stu and TJC for putting up with such a godawful OS and supporting this bit of lunacy.

Stu...the idea came to me like this. I was driving home from work, listening to the radio (as you do). Now, I usually listen to Xfm, which is cool indie type rock, but thought I'd tune into Heart FM, which plays MOR stuff, as it gives me inspiration for parodies. Well, would you believe it, Dion's horrendous theme tune, and BRC's guitar twanging travesty came on one after the other. So I thought...hmmmm...what if I....I'm boring you now, aren't I? :-)

Cheers, all!
Michael Pacholek - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh goody! A new concept album that makes fun of Billy Ray! A spectacular idea! So far, very well executed... which is what both Billy Ray and James Cameron should be: Executed, very well!
Red Ant - August 19, 2006 - Report this comment
I never saw Titanic, and I'm proud of it! This was still awesome though, particularly "Lips are turnin' blue…my testicles are too", "there's lotsa moist décor" ,and of course my fave: "But, sadly, Celine Dion ain't on board"; LOL! 555.
Peregrin - August 21, 2006 - Report this comment
These Billy Ray parodies are fantastic, Kristof !
Jonathan - August 28, 2006 - Report this comment
Pretty dang funny 4's
Spaff.com - September 07, 2006 - Report this comment
I laugh out loud with you. My testicles do too.

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