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Song Parodies -> "How Am I Supposed To Eat Without A Fork"

Original Song Title:

"How Am I Supposed To Live Without You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Michael Bolton

Parody Song Title:

"How Am I Supposed To Eat Without A Fork"

Parody Written by:

MysteryGoat

The Lyrics

From The Album "Hungry Like The Goat"
I could hardly believe it
When I opened the menu
Fifty dollars for a shrimp-kabob
I ordered the special
And they brought it in an hour
With so little on my plate I'm feeling robbed
But tell what is down there
What do you not see that's missing
Let me ask you this before you go.

Tell me how am I supposed to eat without a fork
Cause this certainly isn't finger food
How am I supposed to eat without a fork
And tell me why can't I just catch a break
When I just paid a fortune for my steak.

Potatoes are hardening
And my steak is getting cold
And my drink is coming closer to an end
I see him he's out there
With another group of friends
I'm thinking maybe I should just get it myself
I'm getting ever weaker doesn't he see me dyeing
It'll be the last time I eat here.

Tell me how am I supposed to eat without a fork
Cause this certainly isn't finger food
How am I supposed to eat without a fork
And tell me why can't I just catch a break
When I just paid a fortune for my steak.

No I don't wanna know
The price I'm gonna pay for drinking
Don't say my card was declined.

Tell me how am I supposed to eat without a fork
Cause this certainly isn't finger food
How am I supposed to eat without a fork
And tell me why can't I just catch a break
When I just paid a fortune for my steak.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 1
 0
 
 5   5
 6
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Red Ant - June 20, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Sheesh, sorry MysteryGoat about wiping your votes on this. I forked over a set of 5s. Now I can deduct another 30 "newbie points" from my "score" as this is the second time today I have done that. Now, for some positive news, you know where that 555 came from. I hate to put it this way, but I detest MB and ANY parody of his music would be better than the OS.

I'll make it up.....somehow.
Charlie Decker - June 20, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Eewwww...Michael Bolton. Proud to say that I DKTOS, but I'll have to try and find it before I vote...
Agrimorfee - June 21, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) I couldn't reconcile the pacing of the original title with the parody title.
Adagio - June 22, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) Interesting one! DKTOS though.
Johnny D - June 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) This parody should say DANGER - HIGH BOLTAGE! ;-D
Rick C - June 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05)Finger lickin' good!
Melhi - June 29, 2005 - Report this comment
(H) Heck, I'm still trying to picture a goat eating WITH a fork, in an expensive restaurant! :)
Stuart McArthur - July 03, 2005 - Report this comment
(H) well yes, I think you should've died, right there in front of him, MG - hanging out with his friends indeed! - a customer dead from starvation would teach him a thing or two
Dee Range - July 03, 2005 - Report this comment
I can see you've never watched me eat :-)). I would have been done and signaling for the check while you were still hunting utensils. Neanderthal bloodlines sometimes DO pay off. Good work here.
Scathe - July 03, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-H) I don't think that this has ever happened to me.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - July 05, 2005 - Report this comment
Forking funny, MysteryGoat! "Waiter, there's a waiter in my cold soup!"
"Where? I don't see any-"
*hurls bowl of soup over waiter*
Arwen - July 05, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--I can only remember the chorus of the OS...(I try to forget most Bolton songs if I can...; )...) but this made me laugh anyway...=) Great job!
2nz - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but you made me want to learn a Michael Bolton song, and that is saying something. Funny stuff from just a free-read and:
"And tell me why can't I just catch a break
When I just paid a fortune for my steak."
made me laugh out loud.
Jeff Reuben - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, pacing for the title was a bit off, good song though.

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