I was eating tea Tuesday night
The food looked lood, the food smelled great
But something wasn't right
And it spoiled my appetite

For there was no food I adored
There was no beef, was no lamb
And there was no pork
All there was was sodding quorn

I love my food when it's right
Except that vegetarian shite
All that stuff is wrong
And I sodding hate quorn

Chorus:
I just wanna steak; it makes a decent meal
But cooking its a shame, you must eat it red and raw
If I want a change, maybe I'll have veal
I can't escape the fact that I'm a carnivore
So fill up my plate, as long as i's not quorn

2) I don't care if I can't see at night
I hate carrots, and cauliflower
And as for sprouts they're shite
You can stick a nut roast up your arse

I don't care about my meat
Whether it's pork, lamb or beef
There's so many things
As long as its not quorn

Chorus:

I love my meat, I can't deny it
My inspration's the Atkins diet
The're so many things
And I sodding hate quorn

Chrous to fade