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Song Parodies -> "Calvin And Hobbes"
Original Song Title:
"Heaven Or Hell"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Salt N Pepa
Parody Song Title:
"Calvin And Hobbes"
Parody Written by:
Matthias
The Lyrics
I hate rap, but love the comic. Here's the Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkY4gmLH2RI
Comic books make people grin
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Yes, This cartoon is quite silly like “Steamboat Willie”
Although that’s boring really
Because Bill Watterson could kick the ass of Disney
And Bill’s writing really is quite witty
This kid is gritty, thinking showers are a pity
(Calvin and Hobbes are a duo)… Life is complex
When they take the wagon, go on treks
And Hobbes gets panicked
Fly off a cliff and need a mechanic
These accidents happen every time they crash it
(Well)
They’re standing in the tree house
To go start a case of G.R.O.S.S
(Get Rid Of Slimy girlS) they will boast
Go annoy Susie, but fail to harass
Throw another snowball to knock her on her ass
Girls like her get so cross
Doesn’t go with the flow, takes a blow, and knocks Calvin to Mars
Susie to Calvin shows no grace
She steals Hobbes and dresses him in lace
In class he’ll get beat up by Moe (Yer a b*tch Moe!)
He’s stupid, N’ his brain is really slow (Shut it up! Dweeb!)
He steals just to get a deal for himself
While shoving Calvin into the lockers
(Uh-huh, Uh-huh)
While in class his imagination’s wired (Spaceman Spiff)
Outer-Space (Weird)
Acting as ‘em
Fighting as ‘em
Flying as ‘em
With a gun that’s fires plasm
Was it a Math Test or something worse?
Was Spiff captured by a mad Zerella?
In Calvin’s crazy mixed up Universe
Comic books make people grin
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk
He lives his life a fantasy
Yes (Si) Cardboard technology
He’ll transmogrify
To the eye I’m a fly
Just climb on in Hobbes and turn the fake knobs
I’d rather be a snail before a corncob
He always get in trouble
It’s different in appearing
He thinks that his dinner’s alive
He must kill to survive
He think that the lifeguard in the swimming pool
Is a damn cannibal cook
He is not on crack or drugs he is just six
But might have a sugar rush fix
Far too many “Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bomb” licks
Ah!!!
Calvin’s brain is a nutta
Used a Duplicator to turn doubles into worms found in the gutta
He’s a brain case with extreme imagination
And to bother Susie is his passionate fixation
Calvin and Hobbes… Makes me smirk
Calvin and Hobbes… Makes me smirk
“It builds character” his father will wail
Making Calvin shovel snow in a blizzard of hail
Mom spends her nights getting bugged by her child
She got gray hair at thirty cause her life is too wild
The only break they ever get is when they leave Roslyn
When they do that Calvin’s evil plans, they begin
(He puts on a cape and becomes Stupendous Man)
By saving Calvin’s day and making Ross get the can
Some people wanna play a stupid game like “Halo” or “Total Recall”
This one would rather him and Hobbes play Calvinball
You’re abused, and confused, but to keep themselves amused
A game that has no laws or a stack of rules
The comic ain't dumb, but it is fun
Bill it’s a good one
Is Calvin your son?
Comic books make people grin
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk…
(Repeat)
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Yes, This cartoon is quite silly like “Steamboat Willie”
Although that’s boring really
Because Bill Watterson could kick the ass of Disney
And Bill’s writing really is quite witty
This kid is gritty, thinking showers are a pity
(Calvin and Hobbes are a duo)… Life is complex
When they take the wagon, go on treks
And Hobbes gets panicked
Fly off a cliff and need a mechanic
These accidents happen every time they crash it
(Well)
They’re standing in the tree house
To go start a case of G.R.O.S.S
(Get Rid Of Slimy girlS) they will boast
Go annoy Susie, but fail to harass
Throw another snowball to knock her on her ass
Girls like her get so cross
Doesn’t go with the flow, takes a blow, and knocks Calvin to Mars
Susie to Calvin shows no grace
She steals Hobbes and dresses him in lace
In class he’ll get beat up by Moe (Yer a b*tch Moe!)
He’s stupid, N’ his brain is really slow (Shut it up! Dweeb!)
He steals just to get a deal for himself
While shoving Calvin into the lockers
(Uh-huh, Uh-huh)
While in class his imagination’s wired (Spaceman Spiff)
Outer-Space (Weird)
Acting as ‘em
Fighting as ‘em
Flying as ‘em
With a gun that’s fires plasm
Was it a Math Test or something worse?
Was Spiff captured by a mad Zerella?
In Calvin’s crazy mixed up Universe
Comic books make people grin
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk
He lives his life a fantasy
Yes (Si) Cardboard technology
He’ll transmogrify
To the eye I’m a fly
Just climb on in Hobbes and turn the fake knobs
I’d rather be a snail before a corncob
He always get in trouble
It’s different in appearing
He thinks that his dinner’s alive
He must kill to survive
He think that the lifeguard in the swimming pool
Is a damn cannibal cook
He is not on crack or drugs he is just six
But might have a sugar rush fix
Far too many “Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bomb” licks
Ah!!!
Calvin’s brain is a nutta
Used a Duplicator to turn doubles into worms found in the gutta
He’s a brain case with extreme imagination
And to bother Susie is his passionate fixation
Calvin and Hobbes… Makes me smirk
Calvin and Hobbes… Makes me smirk
“It builds character” his father will wail
Making Calvin shovel snow in a blizzard of hail
Mom spends her nights getting bugged by her child
She got gray hair at thirty cause her life is too wild
The only break they ever get is when they leave Roslyn
When they do that Calvin’s evil plans, they begin
(He puts on a cape and becomes Stupendous Man)
By saving Calvin’s day and making Ross get the can
Some people wanna play a stupid game like “Halo” or “Total Recall”
This one would rather him and Hobbes play Calvinball
You’re abused, and confused, but to keep themselves amused
A game that has no laws or a stack of rules
The comic ain't dumb, but it is fun
Bill it’s a good one
Is Calvin your son?
Comic books make people grin
About this kid name of Calvin
The mailman brings him in your news
So take a look inside there’s nothing to lose
Calvin And Hobbes… Makes me smirk…
(Repeat)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 5 | 20 | 19 | 19 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Wow... old school... brings me back to high school... good job... :)
When Calvin and Hobbes and The Far Side comics left the daily papers I was devastated. Two of my all time favorite cartoons. The Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs brought it all back for me....good job on what must have been a very hard write.
(Artistry) I think this is the best parody you have ever done. No lie.
555 just for the concept. I love reading those comics. I have most of the collections. *sigh*
(Artistry) I love Calvin and Hobbes! I also love it when people take on a crazy rap song. You, my friend, have filled those two niches perfectly. Chumble spuzz!
I can picture Calvin in a rapper outfit performing this. Loved "cardboard technology".
Amazing parody Matthias, easily among your best.
555, too bad he stopped the comic... It's one of my favorite.
DKTOS ... but you've captured EVERYTHING about Calvin and Hobbes!
(Artistry) Technically excellent, Matthias... shame I'm not familiar with Calvin and Hobbes, though as good as this was I may change that. Kudos for wroking in "transmogrify".
Great
SOTM - That comic was kinda big here for awhile and pick up by a lot of papers, probably because at it's peak it successfully adressed both children and adults, even though obviously run together with only kids stuff, which was obvious since those idiots in charge of the local rights for it renamed them Kalle and Hobbe in either a total loop of ignorance or a deliberate circumvention of the original name's nod to classic philosophy. I'll willingly admit that I've read neither, but for a contribution to you-never-know-what-you're-gonna-get-in-the-comments-on-amiright factor I'll pretent to be an obnoxius highbrow arsehole... :-)
(SOTM) This again!? Oh no...heheh, nice to read it again.
Lends new credence to the term "Calvinistic". Not what I think the Calvinists had in mind though. Tough song - good job.
(SOTM) gee that must have takne you a while Matthias, and some killer rhymes, esp. in the first verse - you'd have to be a Calvin and Hobbs fan to truly appreciate this, but I appreciate it anyway - 555 - do Doonesbury and you've got me in the palm of your hand
Good stuff. Just out of curiosity - are there places where mail carriers deliver newspapers?
(SOTM) Commented December 6 ... what I said before ... like you, I hate rap but love C&H, and I recognized EVERY reference you put in. Nice job.
(SOTM) Very good and well written.
(SOTM) See above! Still awesome!
(SOTM) Same comment before, it is an insider type parody, but just the fact that you pulled off a parody of this song is impressive.
SOTM- Wow, Matty... very well done. I loved Calvin and Hobbes when it ran in the papers, and your parody captured the whole essence of it.
(SOTM) Well, as a HUGE C&H fan,I'll say that this was masterful, Matty. As Stu said, some killer rhymes, and a cute dose of humour. 555
I'm another C&H fan - didn't enjoy the OS, but loved the way you pulled of some of the (c)rap rhymes in the same style as the OS. Extremely well done.
Yet another C&H fan. Very well done, I really enjoyed this, and you had a good number of great rhymes
Awesome job! 5s
i agree with smeg and the rest
(ABC) See above
(ABC) See above!
ABC...I'm WAY too scared to ever conquer the rap genre...and this is GREAT in that regard. I also love love LOVE Calvin and Hobbes, so this was a double treat for me. Loved it!!
See previous comment
Great rhymes here, Matt. Still don't know the subject, but it was good to see this again.
(ABC) A lot of work went into this, and it looks clever. However, I found it extremely hard to follow, even after I restarted the song. Only one laugh, and I found one more when I read the lyrics sans music. 5-3-4. Sorry.
ABC--see above!
(Dec3) See above, yet again!
Too many great sound alikes to mention. But I'm forgetting the most important rule: That there are no rules.
(-The score is still Q to 12-) :c]
Also, snowmen.
(-The score is still Q to 12-) :c]
Also, snowmen.
Wow...feels like longer ago than April that I last read this...but it's still a treat! Great job, Matty!
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