Splode man, diving for the Splode can,
Has a giant thirst he needs to quench.
Splode man, aiming for the Splode can,
Dives from bungee chord into the trench.

(Chorus:)
Splode man, do not go, it's forcefully compressed you know,
Says no, no, no, I choose to go down.

Splode man, reaching for the Splode can
Feeling the vibrations in his hand.
Splode man, opening the Splode can
Drinks the violent stream just as he planned.

Chorus

Next man, diving for the next can
Needs the carbonation for his thirst.
Splode can, taken off from the land
Violent soda streams just like the first.

Splode man, forceful flow, got to stop and let it slow.
Says no, cannot slow, need full taste for thirst to go.

Last can blows up on the last man.
Before he even has a chance to think.
Meanwhile the brand is waiting for the Splode man,
Crushed by his beloved deadly drink.

Chorus