FRODO: Mithrandir once told me
"Hey, get this Ring to Bree."
Sam ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
M & P were kind of dumb
SAM: Strider looked like a bum
M&P: We were chased by these kings undead

FRODO: Well, the wraiths start coming and they don't stop coming
Got stabbed in the shoulder, Asfaloth running
Went to Rivendell, didn't have much fun
Aragorn's wise, Boromir is dumb
One thing to do, why can't he see
The Ring we'll have to destroy-ee
To Mordor we'll have to go
FELLOWSHIP: Well, you volunteered, and so:

Hey now, Ringbearer
ARAGORN: You have my sword
FELLOWSHIP: We say
Hey now, Ringbearer
LEGOLAS: You have my bow
FRODO: O.K.!
BOROMIR: The Ring's made of glittering gold!
GIMLI: But that's what we'll have to un-mold...

GANDALF: Ain't a cool place
Caradhras is colder
FRODO: Instead: to Moria!
That choice sure was bolder
GIMLI: But these dwarves are dead "cause they're stiffer
BOROMIR: They have a cave-troll, dude, get the picture!
LEGOLAS: My patience for orcs is wearing quite thin
And to these goblins they are kin.
ARAGORN: Balrog's on fire, we reached the door
Gandalf fell down to Howard Shore's score

FELLOWSHIP: Hey now, Ringbearer
ARAGORN: Gotta go now!
FELLOWSHIP: We say
Hey now, Ringbearer
GIMLI: It's the witch-elf!
FRODO: Oy vey!
GALADRIEL: Gandalf fell into shadow...
BOROMIR: She can read my thoughts, oh no...

(interlude)

FELLOWSHIP: Hey now, Ringbearer
GALADRIEL: Look in the mirror
FELLOWSHIP: We say
Hey now, Ringbearer
GALDARIEL: Star of Elendil!
FRODO: Oh, yay...
BOROMIR: To Gondor, why don't we go...?
ARAGORN: No way, you psycho...

LURTZ: Saruman once asked
"bout orcs of the past
SARUMAN: We need to get the Ring to this place!
LURTZ: I think, yep, what a concept
SARUMAN: It's the Halflings you'll have to get
Through sunlight go fast paaaaced

ARAGORN: Well! The orcs start coming and they don't stop coming
LEGOLAS: Got to use my bow, don't I look stunning?
BOROMIR: I died protecting those two bums
ARAGORN: Be at peace, Gondor's son.
FRODO: Escaped by boat, but golly gee
Why did Sam have to come with me?
ARAGORN: The Uruks we shall follow. (Low!)
So let's hunt some orc and go!

FELLOWSHIP: Hey now, Ringbearer
SAM: On to Mordor
FELLOWSHIP: We say
Hey now, Ringbearer
FRODO: I'm glad you're with me
We're NOT GAY!
FANS: It's been three hours and so
The movie is ending...nooo!
It's been three hours and so
The movie is ending...nooo!