(Spoken)
Space. The Final Cliché.
These are voyages of the star ship Enterprise.
Its continuing mission: to explore strange new holodecks,
To seek out Troi's sanity and Riker's common sense,
And to break the prime directive in ways it's never been broken before...

(Now - sing!)

Come join us all in our trek,
We will go out and greet men with crinkly heads!
Moral dilemmas,
Holodeck is still on the blink.
Our food is all made by machines,
We will drink Earl Grey but no stronger drink.
Data, the android,
Reads us his strange poetry.
Morals are stringent;
We bathe clothed and never have sex.
Come and watch us interfere,
Often breaking our prime directive
So many times that we duct-tape it in place.