Song Parodies -> "Ugly Tie"

Original Song Title:

"Cherry Pie"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Ugly Tie"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Song # 5 of my 12 Parodies of Christmas. This is why it's gotta suck being a dad. No more cool, fun and original gifts just a bunch of really ugly ties.

Tacky, Cotton's Itchy, Wrinkled

Such an Ugly Tie
Got it from my daughter makes me roll my eyes
Polka dots forced to groan: "It's nice"
That ugly tie, Yeah!

Yuck! No way!

Well... Necktie I want to torch
Burn it till it's gone!
Necktie I must flaunt
It's embroidered with lawn gnomes
Hate the way I'm dressed
It makes me look a fright
I'd bring it back to the dang mall
But my daughter would fight, yeah
Yeah, yeah...

Twice a year it is my doom
On my Birthday and Christmas
I get lame gifts
Like these ties that make me grimace
I can't cuss or glare cause
I want to look good as their father
But each time it looks badder
When wrapped 'round my collar

It's green and cream
And ten more colors
Plus it's tye-dye and
I abhor it!

Such an Ugly Tie
Noose worn at the slaughter is what this is like
I don't even work as an office guy
Hate ugly ties
Oh no...

Such an Ugly Tie
Makes my Gucci suit a waste when this thing's applied
Looks so bad my eyeballs have fried
Hate ugly ties...
Ugh!

Buy a box of Tums
An exploding cigar
Name a star in space
Those gifts beat this by far
All these ties are cruddy
And they've got no class
If it's not one you're sewin'
It's tossed in the trash

It seems I'm reamed
Under our poor fir
Will hide more ties
Swear, It's like a torture!

Such an Ugly Tie
Even homeless squatters have got me chastized
Looks so lame with some stains from a pie
That ugly tie
Oh no!

Such an Ugly Tie
It's bright neon with white lace, I've lost all pride
When at church, I'm called the Anti-Christ
Due to my tie!
Tie...

Wear it! Looks so wrong!
Wear it! No way! Nope!

"This is my confessional"

Stuck it in the vacuum
When cleaning the floor
First I made it charred
Won't take it at the store
Kids think it's dandy
They'll keep buying more
That thread's turned into string
Lost my mind and I'll roar

Such an ugly tie
Face of Harry Potter is sewed on, I sigh
Looks so dumb all my nerves have fried
Hate ugly ties
Oh no!

Such an ugly tie!
It's so vile, I'm disgraced, Heard folks chide
Looks so lame, With bright Christmas lights
That ugly tie
Hate ugly ties!!! Yech!
Blah!
Trash it!

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Onslaught - December 04, 2013 - Report this comment

You could always cover it with a nice Christmas sweater.

Parody Pete - December 04, 2013 - Report this comment

I can relate to any ugly tie, it's like the tie that blinds

bobpiecheese - October 19, 2016 - Report this comment

(ABC) I've never really understood the point of a tie, so I can understand why they'd make crappy gifts, ugly or no. Great little parody here, 555 gifts (that aren't ties)!

Rob Arndt - October 19, 2016 - Report this comment

I love neckties. Thank God for Croatian mercenaries of the 17th century who impressed King Louis XIII so much to come up with La Cravate.
http://www.tie-a-tie.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/croatian-necktie.jpg

Agrimorfee - October 19, 2016 - Report this comment

So tell us how you really feel, Matty! A cousin to my Nine Inch Nails parody, "Horrible Tie". Over the top descriptions is what was needed here , and you nailed it.

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