Sometimes TV is a wasteland of violence and sex
And the occasional ad for a softer Kleenex
With all the cops beating up guys to a quivering pulp
But there is one man whose job is to outwit Robert Culp

Columbo
whoa ho
No dumbo
No no no no no

Colum-bo he is the king
He say "Just one more thing"

See his beat up old car whiff his stinky cigar if
he's there it means somebody's dead
With his rumpled up raincoat he'll fumble and take notes you said
The great plan he is hatching looks like he's just scratching his head

Columbo
Oh ho
No dumbo
No no no no no

He smar-ter than-a he look
He al-ways catch-a the crook

See his beat up old car whiff his stinky cigar if
he's there it means somebody's dead
With his rumpled up raincoat he'll fumble and take notes you said
The great plan he is hatching looks like he's just scratching his head

Columbo
Oh ho
No dumbo
No no no no no

He wear the wrinkly pants
The kee-ler have-a no chance

He give them twenty to life
He talk about-a his wife

He ne-ver mad at no one
He don't-a carry no gun

He mum-ble when-a he talk
He played-a by Peter Falk.........