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Song Parodies -> "Dogies Are A Girls Best Friend"

Original Song Title:

"Diamonds Are A Girls Best Friend"

Original Performer:

Carol Channing

Parody Song Title:

"Dogies Are A Girls Best Friend"

Parody Written by:

CML

The Lyrics

The premise here comes from learning that Clint Eastwood and Carol Channing once appeared, in the infancy of Clints career (1956), in the same movie, "The First Traveling Saleslady" .. a movie so well received by the public that it led to the bankruptcy of its producer, RKO Studios. All of which led me to consider -- What if Carol Channing had sung the opening to the show "Rawhide" which was Clint first starring vehicle.
A brisket of beef leaves me less tempermental
Cause dogies are a girls best friend
A salad is grand, but at best supplemental
When your iron's low and fat burning slows
Men grow cold as our bods grow old
And we're all losing muscle on our end
But burgers and Shep pies
They slow down that ass slide
So dogies are a girls best friend

Rawhide is bovine and I aint disapproving
Cause dogies are a girls best friend
Rawhide is bovine and you must keep em moving
Thru rain and weather
Youre hellbent for leather
Some men move, and some men cut
And they all want a gal by their side
But cuttin' or movin' they got my approvin
Cause dogies are a girls best friend

There may come a time when the streams are all swollen
Still dogies are a girls best friend
There may come a time when you keep saying "Rollin'"
They cant understand
Why you had to brand .. Youre just a cowhand!
Now he's at you're side; at the end of ride
But lets see if we'll be more than friends
Cause you wont get your freak on
If he dont spring for mignon
Cause dogies ... and I dont mean lamb chops!
I mean DOGIES!
I mean DOGIES!
DOGIES are a girls best friend!!

(I'll prolly roast forever in woke hell for this, but now that my brain is fixated on Carol Channing .. her signature show was "Hello, Dolly" with Louis Armstrong singing the title song at the end. So how would Louis have sung the theme for "Rawhide." ....

Hello, Dogies
Well, hello Dogies
Its so nice to see you rolling right along
The streams are swelled, Dogies
The weathers hell, Dogies
But you're still moving
Still disapproving
Still branding strong

(And finally ...)

Dogies dont you stray away
Dogies dont you stray away
Dogies dont you stray away, again

I was a big fan of the show "Whose Line Is It Anyway" which featured Ryan Stiles, an extremely tall comedian who did a hilarious dead on impersonation of Carol Channing. Hopefully, I'll get to him to sing this someday ... Now that I think about it, Wayne Brady, does a great Louis Armstrong

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Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 30

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