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Song Parodies -> "Clinton Where Were You?"

Original Song Title:

"Clementine"

Original Performer:

Classic Children's Song

Parody Song Title:

"Clinton Where Were You?"

Parody Written by:

Linda Terhune

The Lyrics

If it was not so, I would tell you.
In a city in Ohio, a heat wave did hit the land
Was so hot, a record scorcher, and attention did demand

Oh my Clinton, oh my Clinton, oh my Clinton where are you
Cincinnati, don't you agree is burning up, sad and blue

He was busy, playing golf while over several days heat raged
And more died in over one week than any US storm engaged

Oh my Clinton, oh my Clinton oh my Clinton where were you
He was off and playing golf while 700 plus died too

Now we see that Mr. Clinton didn't care for all those sick
He was golfing and watching TV that damn country president hick

Oh my Clinton, oh my Clinton oh my Clinton don't you care
That hundreds died on your watch while your golf cart blew cold air

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 54

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   1
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   27
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Where was he? In the White House, doing his job. Creating jobs for people in Ohio, jobs that Bush destroyed with his crazy harebrained tax scheme. He was also trying to create universal health care so that those people didn't have to die. He didn't fail, he was ambushed. Profits before patients = dead patients.
"Nuts!" - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
In his office. With an intern. Doing HER job. On him.
Paul Robinson - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Boy, I coulda sworn it was 2005 and George Bush was President now...But from this piece it looks to me like we're still in the past...how can that be? Oh, wait...I forgot...Linda-the-Liberal-Slayer has her own Special Galaxy...and lives on this really strange planet where the atmosphere distorts logic and thought processes...It's called the "Right-Wing Nut-Case Bizarro World"...and I hear it's quite scary...Oh, Liberal-Slayer, we come in peace and only wish to post our parodies and engage in discussions with people who are within the realm of reason, as we define.it here, on our humble and troubled planet Earth...please do not attempt to destroy us with your withering Bizarro-World mind-melting Nut-Box thought rays...we will respond with the only weapon known to be effective against your kind (residents of the RWNC Bizarro World are impervious to any information that does not support their position or employs any real logic)...RIDICULE, preferably over-the-top, since these weird beings are not particularly good at discerning subtlety...OH...Not voting on this...unlike some people around here...
Linda - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek -- Gosh, it says in the parody where he was, he was actually playing golf! (Slow reader huh?) And Clinton, in all his majesty, created a very real recession and more people in poverty than any other president did since Kennedy! Add that to the FACT that Bush has half the number in poverty in his like 5 years as president. He has higher taxes on the rich than any president in history, more for schools than any other president in history and, gives billions more to those in poverty, (the half that are still there, thank him very much!). Again, you hate facts! Well over 700 died in a heat wave, about 250 more than the hurricane, Clinton knew it was coming, watched people die over a two week period and geepers Michael, just cuz your left wing media did not want to mention those FACTS, again, does not mean those FACTS are not true! You try so hard, little one, but hate, as hobby does not make you right, it just makes you a weak person for hating right over the truth! By the way, didn't you enjoy my facts at all, even in the slightest bit Michael? I am floored hurt " I so wanted to please you!
Linda - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Nuts: Nah, good effort though! He was getting off much later in his do-nothing presidency; this was in the mid '90's. Well, I take that back - he had four in-office public affairs, count em, 4! That is why he could not be re-elected as governor in his home state, (and why Hillary needed to buy a house in NY to go for senator, no one in their home state like them!)... But hey, he also spared Bin's life after he attacked us 6 times and declared war on the USA and/or at our citizens, that is cool huh? He had Bin, no war, right in sight, clean shot, in the middle of nowhere " but, nah. Even after Bin declared war and our guys handed him Bin with TWO opportunities to kill him, he just did not want to look unpopular to us American folk who vote for him and someday his wife... So, you know, he did make 9/11 possible - caused a recession’ lied under oath’ had four public in office affairs; stole from the white house; DOUBLED the poverty numbers in our nation; swore almost daily that there would be health insurance for all while he campaigned for the job; (and had 8 years to keep his promise); he was a role model of immoral behavior for the country and our children --- but he was the great king of all presidents, wasn't he? Old "let em fry and die" Clinton!
Linda - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Paul Robinson - you know, I am embarrassed for you if you think that this parody is a "past thing" and you cannot think past the next moment to discover why it is relevant. If that is not embarrassing enough, you wander on with your comment into the “no-sense-making” land. Come on, you could at the least, dodge your blind hate for a few seconds; count to one hundred and then post your comments!
Adagio - September 17, 2005 - Report this comment
That parody would be extra funny if not true. 5's Liberals will not get out of their hated mindset, no matter what the facts.
Linda - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Adagio - and especially facts! Facts to the fanatical left wing extremists are like garlic to Dracula, they just cannot take them! It is humorous in a way in that when they avoid them and do so with such glaring ignorance, I have to laugh. It gives me a mental impression of little kids, like three years of age or so, covering their ears and chanting, "I can't hear you, I can't hear you”... if done perfectly, the fact pusher will go away, and they can pretend that nasty information was just a bad dream. If you picture their ignorance (without the bliss) in that light, it is somewhat funny, don't you think?
Adagio - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, that's a funny picture...very!
Michael Pacholek - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Oy vey... Clinton did not CREATE a recession, he SOLVED the one that Reagan created with his deficits and banking de-regulation (the one Bush Sr. took the fall for like Hoover did for Harding & Coolidge). You know as much about economics are you do about parody-writing. Clinton created more jobs than any President ever. (Even with population growth factored in, only FDR topped him.) And you think JFK put people into poverty? Usually RW nuts like you PRAISE him for a tax cut! (And nothing else.) I checked the Centers for Disease Control website, and they said 22 died in a 1999 heat wave in Ohio, or roughly as many as die regionwide in a blizzard. 22 = 700? Fuzzy math? And this makes the global warming case, which your boy doesn't believe in. So your "facts" are in fact opposing you! So you've flunked English, math, science AND history. Thank you for playing, we have some wonderful parting gifts.
Adagio - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael, you are supposed to be HELPING any newbie with parody writing, not insulting them. I happen to enjoy Linda's parodies, but if someone had said that to me with 14 parodies, I would give up writing...but I would not give up commenting, however.
John Jenkins - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
In response to Mr. Pacholek’s comment about Clinton solving the “Reagan recession” and also in response to Mr. Pacholek’s accusation that Ms. Terhune is not responding to his “challenge.” I have previously asked Mr. Pacholek specifically what President Clinton did to create the strong economy over which he presided which enabled him to balance the federal budget. I might have missed it, but I have yet to see Mr. Pacholek’s response. And I have previously commented on AmIRight that the four primary factors in the strong “Clinton” economy were: (1) NAFTA (for which I give Clinton a lot of credit, but which most Democrats now oppose), (2) Universal Health Care, which he supported; but, which fortunately, was not passed (primarily as a result of Republican opposition), (3) Welfare reform, which Clinton reluctantly supported when the Republican Senate and Congress forced it upon him, and (4) the business cycle, which occurs mostly independently from legislative actions. President Clinton might deserve some credit for not messing up the economy; but, if these are the primary causes of the strong economy during his presidency, he does not deserve a lot of credit, either.

If Mr. Pacholek can provide some additional facts on why I should give more credit to President Clinton, I would like to see them. Otherwise, I think that a lot of the praise that he directs to Clinton, and some of the criticism that he directs to President Bush, are misplaced.
Offender - September 18, 2005 - Report this comment
I don't see a lot of fiscal responsibility from either party, but I do like to point out that "we, the people" are generally to blame for that: "fiscal responsibility" is a popular phrase, but not a popular practice. In practice, fiscal responsibility means:

-vetoing all spending bills.
-firing 98% of the government's employees.
-abolishing public schools.
-closing all of our foreign military bases and letting other countries fend for themselves.
-dissolving all trade barriers.
-ending Social Security and slashing Medicare and Medicaid back to paying for only the rarest kinds of diseases and disorders (for which seeking remedies is not economically worthwhile for private enterprise).
-dumping all farm subsidies.
-withdrawing completely from the U.N.
-selling off and dumping various odd items our government is maintaining to no one's benefit. (California's auctions on E-Bay are instructive for examples of what kinds of things would be for sale).
-abolishing numerous environmental regulations.
-closing down welfare projects in favor of privately-owned drafty orphanages and workhouses.
-not rebuilding New Orleans.

Needless to say, this is not what people want, and they will not vote for anyone who promises to do all these things. We truly have no one to blame but ourselves.
Agrimorfee - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
So where was George Bush when 500 people died in the heat wave that struck Chicago five years ago!?? Hm? Huh? Hm? Huh?,,,,,,
Lurker - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
You are right, Linda. Ignore the pathetic teeny-boppers who oppose you here. America was horrendously damaged by the presence of Bloody Bill, Gorey Al, and Killary (aka Slick Willie, Slick Hillie, and the Tennessee Turkey).
Paul Robinson - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, Linda, I spent some time fact-checking and could not find a year within Clinton's term when the heat-related death total in Cleveland, OH, USA was out of line with the past or future years for that city. Unfortunately, Cleveland is in an area that has been subjected to extended periods of withering heat for a number of years now, and many structures there, particularly living accomodations for poor and elderly people do not have air-conditioning. This is very unfortunate. It is also not the responsibility of the President of the United States...To become a Federal responsibility in any way I believe a local request for "Disaster" or some type of Emergency declaration would be needed, although I must add that I have not researched this - there is only so much Research I can do for you, Linda...especially since we are not on very good terms...heck, I generally don't do fact-checking for my FRIENDS...it's a lotta work sometimes - Hey, maybe you should try it before you start posting stuff and calling it "Factual"? Whaddya think, any chance of that happening? Anyway, Linda, if you have any reliable/verifiable FACTS that support your claim I'd be happy to take a look at them...just go ahead and post the site address here. Anyway, this should make sense to you. It's about as plainly and straight-forwardly written as anyone can do, I think. Hmmm...that particular sentence is actually a bit awkward...oh, heck...it's understandable...If I were writing to someone who had a finer grasp of language I'd spend some time to fix...but.......Anyway....See, Linda, I AM acquainted with Reality...Would you like me to introduce you some day? Hmmm...I don't think you two would get along...I am sure you would get into a argument right away.
Paul Robinson - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
OOPS! One correction on that last post...I meant to say "CINCINATI, OH, USA"...The rest stands as stated. Gosh, is my face red...now, I know, I know...Linda, YOU'RE RIGHT...that WAS careless of me...and I'm certain you will consider it equally (or perhaps more) grievous to YOUR "error"...accidently putting false claims in your works and referring to them as "Facts". You know, in this case, I would be willing to accept equivalency. I have admitted my error. Will you admit to yours?
Linda - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael, Michael, Michael, I could have sworn that I have posted to your comments and or songs at least a few times about your urge to feel good posting, keep your groupies fed, feel your ego-tripping esteeming rush or what ever, by making things up as you go along does not count. No matter how many bashes you throw out my way, (ie., “You know as much about economics ARE YOU do about parody writing” ), and how many unrelated facts you scoop up so you can have the pleasure of sounding right and calling my math “fuzzy” " it simply does not make your crap true! I would not be bothered as much if you used your bold statements that appear to be ‘grand’ or your childish stuff like “so you’ve flunked English, math, science AND history. (this fragment sentence and your horrid grammar mistakes in this paragraph leave you little room to talk scholastics, especially in the same post as your big errors, by the way) if you kept that crap to your groupies, new people or anyone who does and has in the past “bought into your showy crap. But you should know by now, I am not a groupie of the great “Michael” parody man. I do not look at your show to decide if you know what you are talking about and if you are giving out true facts. Because I have found with your posts and parodies that many “claims” and proclamations of reality that you make are far from the truth and seemingly just made up on the spot to suit your positions. So, please, just try huh? Having said that, lets look at your big show and your way cool and righteous facts here… Just because you fudge facts to suit your own purposes, does not mean that all people do that, and I can safely say that I do not personally use made up facts and showboating to back them up, I actually use real facts and stay in reality " someone must here, don’t you think? 1. Here are the years with the percentage of the population of the US in poverty: 969 thru 1963 23% 67 thru 87 stayed under 15% and as low as 11% 91 thru 99 it consistantly grew from 11% to 14% 2001 to now consistantly reduced from 14% to 10.75% The biggest area of poverty growth during the Clinton administrations influx of poverty stricken folk was in the southern states which during his entire presidency grew at a surprisingly rapid rate. Now, the south has a 11% poverty rate and getting better, while Clinton's actual poverty numbers in the south were almost a record highs at 16% (it was beaten slightly by the 17% poverty rate that we experienced in the south in 63 to 67. Bush has managed to get the overall US poverty rate way down in his 4.5 years in office while in the Clinton years he managed to lose control of the poverty rate that was growing alarmingly in his entire 8 years to work on it a bit better than he apparently was. >>>>>>Your math is merely a “pick and choose” the figures that fit your needs and build a case for it’s truthfulness by being a blowhard, so what is that called, “tailored for Michael Math”? Now, keep the above info in mind and keep in mkind the FACT that Bush has spent more money than any other president on poverty programs " some 50 billion more than Clinton spent as the poverty level ROSE: (this is an eye opener Michael, use it to break apart some of the blocks that have left you with so little perspective and logic… …………………………. “””””””””’Sweltering temperatures across the southwest area of the United States have claimed the lives of over 120 people in Texas, Louisiana, Oklahoma, California, Arizona and Missouri. From the state of Florida in the South through Texas and Colorado, nearly two months of continuous heat and drought have caused scores of deaths, burned out homes and withered crops. the highest number of people to die from heat-related deaths in the United States was in --------- JULY 1995, ----- when extremely high temperatures claimed over 700 lives, mainly in the city of Chicago. Many who died in that tragedy lived in high-rise project complexes without any air conditioning.
Linda - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
cont... >>>>>>>>>>While most media accounts portray the heat wave as a "natural tragedy," there is an important social dimension. An examination of who has suffered and why points to the class and social divisions within American society. The overwhelming majority of victims in every state have been working class and poor. For low-wage workers who are American born, and particularly for the elderly, conditions are little better than for the immigrants. Others died in rural areas without fans or with limited access to water. In other cases the victims were elderly people living on fixed incomes, who are reluctant to use air conditioning even if it were available for fear of high utility bills……. The past weekend was the deadliest in Cincinnati. Five of heat victims in the city were found in homes where temperatures were near 100. One heat victim, a 99-year-old woman, was found dead in her home with a core body temperature of 107. The majority of victims were over 64 years of age and six suffered from heart disease or other chronic conditions. All the victims' homes lacked air-conditioning or adequate ventilation. One elderly victim had an air-conditioner, but wasn't using it because of the cost. She died of heat stroke Saturday. In addition, dozens of Cincinnati residents were treated at local hospitals for heat exhaustion and heat stroke.-------- “We all know that a tornado or hurricane is a deadly natural event,” said Hamilton County Coroner Carl Parrott, “but people don't realize calm, still, beastly hot summer weather has lethal potential.” --------------- CITY officials in Cincinnati have declared a “heat emergency.” However the measures taken to help poor and elderly residents have been minimal. Public buildings have been opened as “cooling centers” and some free fans have been distributed. However medical experts note that at temperatures over 90 fans do little to cool the body.----------- The media generally presented the deaths as a product of the forces of nature. Nowhere to be found was any consideration of how >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>high utility rates, cutbacks in federal spending for housing and energy assistance or the lack of adequate housing may have contributed to the high death toll. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>MEANWHILE, the White House is moving ahead with plans to add to the existing chaos in the power industry by moving to decentralize the generation of electricity. At a conference of the National Association of Regulatory Utility Commissioners last week in San Francisco Energy Secretary Richardson called for legislation to make the power industry more competitive and efficient. Inevitably, the introduction of market competition will lead to a form of economic rationing as poor and working class customers are forced to cut use in the face of soaring electrical costs.<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Michael Pacholek - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Linda: Shakespeare must've had you in mind when he had Macbeth speak of a tale full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. You remind me of Edward Everett, who spoke for two hours at Gettysburg, then Lincoln spoke for four minutes and made more sense. John J: Clinton's first two budgets, which not one Republican voted for, fixed the economy.
carol - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael-take a minute or two to read her last post to me from her parody of Nirvana's "Smells like Teen Spirit". And her last post to Paul.
Agrimorfee - September 20, 2005 - Report this comment
Notice dear Linda has no comments to respond about Chicago.
(Agrimorfee) - September 20, 2005 - Report this comment
But what about--
Conan O'Brien - September 20, 2005 - Report this comment
In the yeeear 2000...

Bush was not yet President!
Linda - September 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek - nice try, but your facts are so lacking and your inablity to address the facts presented to you are telling
Linda - September 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Michael Says - """"""""":You remind me of Edward Everett, who spoke for two hours at Gettysburg, then Lincoln spoke for four minutes and made more sense. John J: """""" As long as we are sharing our personal thoughts, you remind me of a parody writer who has written countless political parody songs and yet, they are all just that one.

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