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Song Parodies -> "King's New Codes"

Original Song Title:

"Kings New Clothes"

Original Performer:

Danny Kaye

Parody Song Title:

"King's New Codes"

Parody Written by:

Glynn Leaney

The Lyrics

Andy King and I were computer programmers in the early days at RAF Innsworth in the UK.
KING’S NEW CODES

This is the story of King’s new codes.
Once upon a time there was a young computer programmer called King.
Now, one day King was instructed to produce a new set of codes for the pay
Review, given to him by the big boss himself – Big G.
After spending many long hours and earning much overtime, King produced a big binder full of foolscap pages, presented it to Big G and said,

“Sir, here is your new set of codes. This, however, is no ordinary set of codes, but a magic set that has cost me a lot of effort.” King went on to explain:
“To a fool, it appears that there’s nothing on the paper at all. But to an ambitious, switched-on officer with thoughts on his next annual report, this is the most fantastic set of codes ever produced.”

Well, naturally, not wanting to appear a fool, Big G bellowed,

“Isn’t it neat, isn’t it fine, look at the code on every line!

This set of codes is altogether but altogether it’s altogether and altogether the finest set of codes I’ve ever seen. The pages here are bound in leather, I don’t know whether If I have ever seen anything like it before in my life, the best I’ve ever seen. Call the wing commanders!”…and very soon they convened.

Now as soon as the wing commanders were standing rigid to attention, eyes peering over the top of the desk in Big G’s office, King hurriedly explained to them about the magic set of codes.

Well, naturally, this dynamic duo with ideas of possible promotion, and not wanting to appear fools, stuttered,

“Look at the text, look at the style,, must be the best in the airmen’s file.

This set of codes is altogether but altogether it’s altogether and altogether the finest set of codes we’ve ever seen. Results will show there’s nothing better, we don’t know whether if we have ever seen anything like it before in our lives, the best we’ve ever seen. Call the entire department…in the conference room they convened.

Well, within minutes the entire department had rushed to the conference room. All the section leaders were there, the programmers with their task sheets were there, maxtesters, protesters, CAs and typists were there. All had assembled and were quickly told about the magic set of codes.

Well, naturally, not wanting to appear fools, they exclaimed,

“Isn’t it oooh, isn’t it aaah, isn’t it absolutely wheee!

This set of codes is altogether but altogether it’s altogether and altogether the finest set of codes we’ve ever seen. This work results from dedication, an inspiration, a mild sensation, this new creation should now be seen by all at the PMC. Get them all assembled…including the AOC.”

And so it was that the entire Personnel Management Centre staff was told about the magic set of codes. One by one, members filed past and gasped in amazement at the leather-bound pages…all that is except Annie with her trolley.
You see, Annie had been too occupied to hear about the magic set of codes and, unaware of what she was supposed to see, when she saw the blank pages cried out:

“Look at this thing, look at this thing, look at this thing, this thing, this thing!

This set of codes is altogether but altogether it’s altogether and altogether as empty as the rolls I try to sell. I don’t find this at all exciting, it’s not the lighting, there is no writing, I think it’s frightening to thin that you’ve been taken in as well.”

The entire civil service suddenly got nervous,
They suddenly found themselves wide open to ridicule and scorn.
Now King is in the altogether but altogether is altogether and altogether as junior as the day that he was born,

And all hopes of future promotion are all forlorn!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 1.3
How Funny: 1.3
Overall Rating: 1.3

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   13
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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