I got to say it and it's hard for me,
You've been a bad dog. That's right, bad doggy.
Thought I could trust you, but you let me down.
I see you chasing cars all over town.
And I,

Walk to the front gate and it's really hard
Due to all the holes that you've dug in the yard.
How 'bout you take a sniff of my shoe?
That's not the worst thing I hate about you

Built me a fence to keep my dog from straying
I'm trying, you get out all the same.
What do I do to somehow get my life back? I'm praying
Hear no complaints!
Walk in bare feet again!

Why do you have to be a car chaser?
Is it an instinct that I never knew?
Long before cars, did some chariot racer
Deal with this too?

Why do you have to be a car chaser?
Now all the drivers think they're my enemy!
Suddenly I'm getting flipped and I'm taunted
from passers-by.
It has to end
Could you just try?

Dogs are the dumbest in the universe.
And don't look so hungry
when you're chasing a hearse!
I make the rules. Now you listen, see?
I'm sick of postmen stuck up the tree.

Out of my mind I am sent by the antics of you, boy.
Tell me why oh why, do you drink the toilet dry?

Why do you have to be a car chaser?
Tore off a fender- you call that pedigree?
Suddenly I'm trying to stop the mauling
of passers-by.

Why do you have to be a car chaser?
I'm getting threats from guys I never knew
And the front yard has turned into a minefield
of doggy-doo

Why do you have to be a car chaser?
Now people won't deliver pizza to me!
Suddenly I'm hearing screaming in terror
from passers-by.
It has to end
Could you just try?