Well since his girlfriend left him
He's found a new place to smell
It's down at the end of the hall, turn right
The Fart Break Hotel
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

He sits there with his paper
Oblivious to the smell
The gasses creeping down the hall
Are like the fumes from hell
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

He used to have a hound dog
That used to drink from the bowl
The dog up and died, it's no surprise
The poison took its toll
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

If you have to go there
Don't look into the can
It's a nauseating history
Of an unhygienic man
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

If you go to that toilet
You have to hold your breath
Don't inhale for heaven's sake
Or it will be your death
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

I think it's started growing
That toilet's come alive
So make sure you don't go in
If you want to survive
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die

Well since his girlfriend left him
He's found a new place to smell
It's down at the end of the hall, turn right
The Fart Break Hotel
Ah well, don't go to the toilet, Don't go to the toilet
Don't go to the toilet, you could die
Don't go to the toilet, you could die