Beans and cabbage, beans and cabbage,
They'll make your flatulence smell like raw sewage,
Be kind to your brother,
Don't make him cough and spit and smother.

Beans and cabbage, beans and cabbage,
Air you will pollute with noxious windage
Don't need tele-met-ry,
The stench will tell you evident-ly.

Fry, fry, fry and percolate them,
Such an intrusion.
My, my, my, your geiger counter,
Says there's been fusion.

Beans and cabbage, beans and cabbage,
Air you will pollute with noxious windage,
Slips out like hot butter,
You're breakin' wind with your cheese cutter.

Beans and cabbage, beans and cabbage,
When mixed together they can be quite savage.
If I had my druthers,
I'd end their fun,
They'd just eat one,
Yes sir, just one and not the other.
Yes sir.