[Soprano]: 400 labor pangs I’ve Borne. I can’t Wait, until it’s Over; I am Tired, of being pregnant
[Tenor]: For nine long months I’ve had to put up - [Soprano]: Oh, a contraction comes once more---
[Tenor]: - With complaints, of morning sickness, pants won’t fit, she’s really nervous
[Alto]: For the past three months I have waddled… [Bass]: Been up since 4 o’clock this morn-
[Alto]: Every Night, I use the Bathroom, several Times, I cannot hold it. [Bass]: -ning. Water broke,
[Alto]: I am in – [Bass]: Our mattress ruined. [Alto]: - so much discomfort.
[Tenor]: Should’ve used a condom That is what I told--- [Soprano]: All this extra weight makes –
[Tenor]: - her. [Soprano]: - me look 10 years old---
[Alto & Bass]: There’s a bunch of baby names– [Soprano]: -er. [Soprano, Alto & Bass]: - in this here folder,
[SATB]: And his name shall be call-ed: Adrian; Benjamin. We can’t agree, this Talk could last forever, oh God help me!
[Alto]: All my Nerves are badly worn [Tenor]: Now, all her pubic hair’s been shorn ---
[Alto]: What the Hell, now was I thinking? [Soprano]: I must be a crazy gal. [Bass]: Can’t believe I’ll be a daddy.
[Alto]: And it feels like I’ve been Carrying a boul--- [Bass]: Had enough of this complaining now I scold her. [Alto]: -der.
[Soprano & Tenor]: And his name [Alto & Bass]: And his name [SATB]: shall be call-ed: Christopher; Dominic.
Almighty God, You want the last word always, to keep the peace.
[Tenor]: Wonder if he’ll look like me? [Soprano]: I want some Pickles Jubilee!
[Bass]: Yeah, her tits grew two sizes more. [Alto]: Now he just wants to watch bad porn ----
[Bass]: But she said, “You must not touch ‘em”. [Soprano & Tenor]: Unto us, no sex is given.
[Tenor]: All she seems to want is Just for me to hold her
[Soprano]: All these hormones really making me feel so much Bolder!
[Alto & Bass]: My affection for this Man is turning colder
[SATB]: And his name shall be call-ed: Gregory; Gabriel.
How mighty odd, we’ve never fought before, now let’s make peace!
[Bass]: I’m not ready for a baby. [Soprano, Alto & Tenor]: Well.
[SATB]: All your Doubts make me feel scorn
[Tenor & Bass]: I’ve endured Your nasty mood swings, waking me, with loudest belching
[SATB]: And then there’s Your deadly farting.
[Soprano]: I’m the one who – [Soprano & Alto]: had to put up with episiotomy.
[Tenor & Bass]: And the baby
[SATB]: And the baby now is presenting his shoulder. And his name shall be calle-ed Yukio; Zebulon!
[Break!]
[SATB]: Oh my good God, we Gave birth to a daughter, the Princess pees! I Am at last a [Soprano & Alto]: mother, [Tenor & Bass]: Father. [SATB]: now I can sleep
[Baby]: Waahhh!