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Song Parodies -> "I am the Very Model of a Modern Business Criminal"
Original Song Title:
"I am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General"
Original Performer:
Gilbert & Sullivan
Parody Song Title:
"I am the Very Model of a Modern Business Criminal"
Parody Written by:
Ferdinand
The Lyrics
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
I hypnotize your children with the messages subliminal
I control all the prices, and I buy and sell small businesses
And I'll knock at your door faster than all the Jehovah's Witnesses
I'm very well acquainted with legal stuff like budget loopholes
I'll send your entire family all down to live in a poop hole
About the Fourth Amendment, I am a model PATRIOT
But when it comes to taxes, all my money is expatriate
I'm very good with corporate and modern business partnerships
I know all the history of industrialist capitalism
In short, in matters corporate, legal and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
I look up to philanthropists Rockefeller and Carnegie
And seek to regain influence in the modern university
I think voting for Obama was the worst debacle in history
And how Clinton possibly got a surplus is a mystery
In practical biology, I own all the pharmaceuticals
If you don't keep buying my drugs, you'll be bleeding from your cuticles
I hold up courts just wasting time with my speeches rhetorical
And you'll be having hemorrhoids; that isn't metaphorical
I don't use math to find my profits, I just tell you what they will be
Inherited all this from Daddy, didn't get a bachelor's degree
In short, in matters corporate, medical and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
In fact, when I believe these stupid lies from all you bleeding hearts
When I finally can understand what's the point behind liberal arts
When such things as hobgoblins like struggling masses I can believe in
And if I ever understand how it would be good to just break even
When I'll get off the market because of the ninety-nine percent
Or figure out it's bad to live nicely to just what extent
In short, when I figure out your socialist biology
I'll find out how to destroy it with experimental pharmacology
For my genius business knowledge, though I don't really know anything
Is only a real problem, 'cause I've already learned everything
But still, in matters corporate, legal and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
I hypnotize your children with the messages subliminal
I control all the prices, and I buy and sell small businesses
And I'll knock at your door faster than all the Jehovah's Witnesses
I'm very well acquainted with legal stuff like budget loopholes
I'll send your entire family all down to live in a poop hole
About the Fourth Amendment, I am a model PATRIOT
But when it comes to taxes, all my money is expatriate
I'm very good with corporate and modern business partnerships
I know all the history of industrialist capitalism
In short, in matters corporate, legal and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
I look up to philanthropists Rockefeller and Carnegie
And seek to regain influence in the modern university
I think voting for Obama was the worst debacle in history
And how Clinton possibly got a surplus is a mystery
In practical biology, I own all the pharmaceuticals
If you don't keep buying my drugs, you'll be bleeding from your cuticles
I hold up courts just wasting time with my speeches rhetorical
And you'll be having hemorrhoids; that isn't metaphorical
I don't use math to find my profits, I just tell you what they will be
Inherited all this from Daddy, didn't get a bachelor's degree
In short, in matters corporate, medical and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
In fact, when I believe these stupid lies from all you bleeding hearts
When I finally can understand what's the point behind liberal arts
When such things as hobgoblins like struggling masses I can believe in
And if I ever understand how it would be good to just break even
When I'll get off the market because of the ninety-nine percent
Or figure out it's bad to live nicely to just what extent
In short, when I figure out your socialist biology
I'll find out how to destroy it with experimental pharmacology
For my genius business knowledge, though I don't really know anything
Is only a real problem, 'cause I've already learned everything
But still, in matters corporate, legal and in general
I am the very model of a modern business criminal
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 3 | 4 | 4 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
That sound you hear is me bowing down to you in awe. How in the holy heck did you manage to do this?? If it was possible to give you more than 555 for this I certainly would!
I support all the effort you put in here. THe time you put in shows and I enjoyed it. Please find nit-picky stuff below: Some slight pacing mis-steps, and several areas where the accents of the original didn't match with your subbed lines hindered it overall, but that's an obsessive accent-matcher speaking. Again, great job and enjoyed it :c)
Twoché!
As Glen: great effort, creative rhyming, nice concept, and the way you sustain it is first-rate, but I found the rhythm and pacing awkward here and there, and several lines seem to have one too many syllables. Most AIRheads attempt this piece for the prime purpose of licking the pacing challenge, so you have to strive for perfection with this one. Well done but have to knock off a point for pacing.
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