In sweeping the election to our nation's highest service,
He triumphed o'er recounted chad through courts that did preserve us.
He saved us from Gore's wretched lies, his wiles, and his vexes;
That scintillating, liberating, losing, but self-vindicating Dubya Bush from Texas.
Due to a state of hicks, ha ha!
He needed Baker's fix, ha ha!
That scintillating, liberating, losing, but self-vindicating Dubya Bush from Texas.

When terrorists attacked our land and caused unheard of trauma,
He sought to mete out reprimand, but couldn't find Osama.
He blew apart Afghanistan with rantings and with flexes -
That mystifying, loss-denying, anxious fear intensifying Dubya Bush from Texas.
To a President adrift, ha ha!
A crusade's a welcome shift, ha, ha!
That mystifying, loss-denying, anxious fear intensifying Dubya Bush from Texas.

When toppling that bad Taliban proved insufficient spoil,
The War on Terror turned to the Rogue Despot (and his oil).
He got those nasty weapons from Iraq, 'cause he protects us -
That strategizing, neutralizing, 'venging (and economizing!) Dubya Bush from Texas.
To those of lesser straw, ha ha!
He modeled shock and awe, ha ha!
That strategizing, neutralizing, 'venging (and economizing!) Dubya Bush from Texas.

He'll leave no child left behind and build on Mars a station,
Our fiscal woes of every kind address with less taxation,
And shortly marriage codify (it matters what your sex is),
That visionary, voluntary, caring, and extr'ordinary Dubya Bush from Texas.
Compassionate his ways, ha ha!
If in the press it plays, ha ha!
That visionary, voluntary, caring, and extr'ordinary Dubya Bush from Texas.