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Song Parodies -> "Battle Hymn of the Republicans"

Original Song Title:

"Battle Hymn of the Republic"

Original Performer:

Julia Ward Howe

Parody Song Title:

"Battle Hymn of the Republicans"

Parody Written by:

Richard Murphy

The Lyrics

They’re lining up to run in twelve against the President;
They say that he deserves to go, a one term resident;
They’ll sweep away the Democrats and seize the government.
Republicans will rule!

Refrain:
They shall rule the House and Senate;
They'll elect the next President;
They are guided by one tenet;
To gut the government!

There’s Newt Gingrich, former Speaker, now a scholar of the past
His contract with America was bold but didn’t last.
His smarts and savvy may be by his ex-wives overcast,
But Newt goes marching on.

Refrain

Sarah Palin of Alaska is the favorite of the lot;
She is guided by her sense of truth, and facts bother her not.
The key is how she does when the campaign starts getting hot.
Ms Palin’s marching on.

Refrain

There’s Mitt Romney late of Utah, but he harks from Belmont, Mass.
He is favored by the party bigs, but may be out of gas.
He is smooth and safe but voters see an opportunist ass,
Yet Mitt keeps marching on

Refrain

Mike Huckabee of Arkansas, a preacher in his youth;
Makes claims and accusations that are often short on truth.
He will likely be abandoned by the voter in the booth.
Yet Mike keeps marching on.

Refrain

Ron Paul, who’s done this all before, is doomed to fail again;
America’s not ready for a Libertarian.
His time might best be spent doing his job as congressman.
But Paul keeps running on

Refrain

To win the nomination they will all run to the right;
Then they shift back to the middle for the presidential fight.
But can they overcome Obama’s billion dollar might:
It’s not a pretty sight.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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AFW - April 06, 2011 - Report this comment
Pops the 2012 race into an entertaining capsule
Michael Pacholek - April 06, 2011 - Report this comment
But under the Republicans' idea of health-care reform, AFW, no one will be able to afford that capsule. I used this title back in 1996, before there was an Amiright, after I'd heard the great Mark Russell do it: "Mine eyes ain't seen the platform, but I hear it's mighty firm. All hail our party's symbol, the little egg and sperm... " I finished mine with Bob Dole asking Elizabeth, following his (expected and eventual) defeat, "How do you turn this lawn mower on?"
Old Man Ribber - April 06, 2011 - Report this comment
Murph - Fine job (even amusing to a Republican like me). You've been rather nice and meant this as humor rather than invective. A suggestion - vary the chorus each time. I've been marked down for it. Of course, I get marked down for even being here...lol! ;D
Phil Alexander - April 07, 2011 - Report this comment
The Repub's nomination list is really not that strong
They think that one of those can win? I'm betting that they're wrong
Maybe they hope next year's campaign will be 'bout five years long
That's what they're running on?
Patrick - August 18, 2011 - Report this comment
Wish I had seen this sooner. You are quite an astute observer. This song will be worth updating as time goes on and even more contenders enter the race.

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