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Song Parodies -> "Battle Hymns of the Armies of Mordor"

Original Song Title:

"Battle Hymn Of The Republic"

Original Performer:

Julia Ward Howe

Parody Song Title:

"Battle Hymns of the Armies of Mordor"

Parody Written by:

Adam Eccleshall

The Lyrics

Minor pronunciation note - "Shire" and "trail" in the first verse each need to be sung as 2 syllables
[Nazgul]
We rode from Minas Morgul, Dark Lord Sauron's Ring to get
We were told "it's in the Shire", but we haven't found it, yet
Now we've picked up on the trail of a band of hobbitses
So we'll go riding on

Glory! Glory! Dark Lord Sauron!
Glory! Glory! Dark Lord Sauron!
Glory! Glory! Dark Lord Sauron!
As we go riding on

We approached their camp at Weathertop, and broke a Morgul blade
But the ranger fought us off, then teamed up with an elven maid
She gave orders to the river, and the river, it obeyed
Now we go floating home

Gurgle, burble, burble, gurgle
Gurgle, burble, gurgle, burble
Gurgle, burble, burble, gurgle
As we go floating home


[Orcs & Uruk-Hai]
We shall march beneath the banner of the mighty Saruman
He has sent us forth to carry out his heinous, evil plan
Now we're headed off to Rohan to destroy the race of man
So we go marching on

Gory, gory death to Rohan!
Gory, gory death to Rohan!
Gory, gory death to Rohan!
As we go marching on

They escaped into their fortress and their elven friends arrived
We were gonna blow it up with powder Saruman supplied
But they called upon the Rohirrim, now most of us have died
We won't go marching on

Orc and Uruk-Hai limbs scattered
Orc and Uruk-Hai limbs scattered
Orc and Uruk-Hai limbs scattered
We won't go marching on


[Corsairs of Umbar]
We had thought we'd head for Pelennor, so mighty ships we'd board
But then Aragorn showed up with his almighty spectral horde
So we died to pangs of terror, not the clashing of a sword
We won't go sailing on

Scary, spooky ghostly army
Scary, spooky ghostly army
Scary, spooky ghostly army
We won't go sailing on

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   21
 22
 22
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

2nz - November 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Nice one. Some leaps of faith for the rhyme scheme to work, but overall a really solid Tolkienized parody. Especially liked the 'Gurgle, burble, burble, gurgle' repeat and the stanza directly proceeding it.
Arwen - November 14, 2005 - Report this comment
HOO-to the freaking-RAY! This is just fantastic, Adam!! I loved pretty much the whole darn thing...but of course "She gave orders to the river, and the river, it obeyed" made me grin a little bit bigger than most...=) 5s!
Phil Alexander - November 14, 2005 - Report this comment
What Arwen said: this is one of the very best LOTR parodies, period. Definitely worthy of a SOTM entry.
Rex - November 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Like 2nz, really enjoyed the gurgle line when I got to it. This is close to perfect.
stuart mcarthur - November 14, 2005 - Report this comment
without knowing the characters, I can still appreciate a well-written parody - jusy chugged along beautifully and rhythmically -555
Adam Eccleshall - November 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, guys :-)
Dumb Ass Kid - December 08, 2005 - Report this comment
[SOTM] well-written, and like Stu said, i'm not a LOTR fan but this is great 555
Stuart McArthur - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) see above - amazingly I was going to make the exact same comment, before seeing that I'd been there before me - love the rhythm/pacing of this one, Adam
Josh 2 - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) dktos soz n how would stu know YOU dont now LOTR DAK?
Red Ant - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Not having seen LotR doesn't lesson my appreciation for a finely crafted parody. Great work here Adam.
Agrimorfee - December 12, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) A fine piece of work in the felk music tradition.
Matthias - December 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Where we're you when I was doing The Lord of the Dance? This is perfect!!!
Spaff.com - December 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Even without total recall of all the bazillions of characters, locations, and battles in LOTR, I can still appreciate this. I particularly like the second verse and its chorus. Excellent job. I predict that you've sparked a bunch more "Battle Hymn" parodies.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - December 22, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM - I'm a fan of LotR parodies and this was very good stuff. At this point LotR parodies need something new/extra and the operatic drama of TOS (I take it that JWHs version is no different) had that extra that made it worth the time.
bobpiecheese - December 22, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) There was a song called 'Battle Hymn Of The Republic'? With actual words?! I didn't know that. Nice job, anyway.
Phil Alexander - December 27, 2005 - Report this comment
:-)
Tim Mayfield - December 28, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM - Wonderful choice and development. Very nice.
Kristof Robertson - December 29, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The OS fits the subject perfectly, Adam...done with a huge amount of GUSTO (my word of the week)..great job. 555
wannabemustangjockey - December 29, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Flawless parody. I love it. And since I've seen the movies multiple times I actually know what you're talking about!
John Jenkins - December 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Clever rhyming and excellent choruses.
Johnny D - December 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Hear that disturbing sucking sound? Don't worry, that's just me voting my fives, since I'm such a sucker for good LOTR parodies like this.
Claude Prez - December 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Very very good. Not a big LOTR fan but I've always liked this original song and it fit very well. This is one of those really good ideas that obviously fell into the right hands.
2nz - January 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Still very well-written and great use of the story details. A huge winner among heavy 'Rings' fans. ANd I still like 'Gurgle, burble'.

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