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Song Parodies -> "Tore Out Your Heart with Marine KA-BAR"

Original Song Title:

"Give Me a Break of that Kit Kat Bar"

Original Performer:

Kit Kat Bar Commercial

Parody Song Title:

"Tore Out Your Heart with Marine KA-BAR"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The famous KA-BAR combat knife has been used from WW2 through Korea, Vietnam, Grenada, both Gulf Wars and on to Afghanistan. Favored by SFs and some HRUs worldwide. The one here is the original 7" of 1095 carbon-steel with a clip-point and leather-washer handle. Modern versions are now made double-edged, drop-point, tanto, and so on with carbon-vanadium and a Kraton non-slip rubber handle. The name KA-BAR comes from a letter to the Union Cutlery Company about how one of their knives saved a trapper's life when he was attacked by a bear and his rifle jammed. He used the knife to kill the bear. The last part of the letter was barely legible so KA-BAR comes from the phrase to "Kill A BeAR"! The KA-BAR was adopted by the USMC in Nov 1942 and then later by the USN. Although a supreme fighting knife, the Germans had theirs too, mainly out of Solingen Germany. Eickhorns and Pumas with a Fallschirmjaeger anti-gravity knife too. Today the Bundeswehr uses an Eickhorn and sometimes the Glock 81 for HRUs. Puma's best combat knife is reserved for KSK and is much stronger and durable than a KA-BAR. It's HRC rating is much higher. The Germans also are pioneering crystal steel knives that are illegal to possess for civilians. This is an impregnated steel that cuts with both edges and both sides as well. Please note that although the Union Cutlery Co, of Olean, NY claims to have made the KA-BAR, it aquired the manufacturing rights from Pennsylvania German knifesmith partnership, Tidioute Cutlery that went out of business. The famous "Kentucky Rifles" of US history were also made by Pennsylvania German gunsmiths. FYI...
Knife sealed your fate
Knife sealed your fate
Tore out your heart with Marine KA-BAR
Carbon-steel clip point, Union Cutlery
Leather-washer handle, commando fury
Knife sealed your fate, SLAIN!
Knife sealed your fate, SLAIN!
Tore out your heart with,
blood outta your mouth spits,
From sharp KA-BAR!!!

[Edged weapon battlefield star]
Note: Best swords in the world are made in Toledo, Spain and the best knives IMHO are from Solingen, Germany (Custom Damascus steel blades included)!!!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Patrick - April 29, 2013 - Report this comment
KA-BAR is trademark. Same knife made as the USN MK2 by a variety of manufacturers. I always liked the looks of the big Italian combat knife. The Hungarians had a huge knife in WWI that was rather impressive looking. The Fallschirmjaeger gravity knife has a weak point where the back spring flexes. You see a lot of those broken. The Czechs made a better gravity knife, with a simple coil spring. Only a thousand or so produced, sell for $900 or more. British Fairbairn Sykes knife is a highly specialised knitting needle, Not much good for cutting and certainly no pry bar. Kansas Governor Sam Brownback just signed law repealing state's archaic prohibition on switchblades. Have you ever heard of an SA man using his M33 dress dagger as a weapon? The Sturmabteilung started carrying daggers in the days when they were fighting with the Communists in the streets. I surely must have occured to someone to stick a red with one of these.
Jonathan - April 29, 2013 - Report this comment
wow pretty sharp writing there and now I want a kit-kat bar 5's

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