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Song Parodies -> "Shopping Trip"
Original Song Title:
"Sleigh Ride"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Leroy Anderson
Parody Song Title:
"Shopping Trip"
Parody Written by:
Claude Prez
The Lyrics
Just hear that cold wind howling and snowplows plowing on through
But we know that won't stop you; you'll drag me shopping with you
Inside the wives are buying and husbands crying boo-hoo
I'd rather eat yak droppings than to be hat shopping with you
Ring it up! Ring it up! Ring it up! Let's go
It's time for my show
I'm missing an "Alf" rerun, you know
Bag it up! Bag it up! Bag it up! I'm done
This day's as much fun
As standing around while a clown takes a staplegun to my tongue
My wallet's nice and empty but we've got plenty of new
Expensive worthless items the world's been hiding from you
With all these shops before us you'll make us poor as dirt too
Oh God this time's unending I'm spend-spend-spending with you
By the dressing room I find an empty bench at last
I'll be right here checking out some teenage wench's ass
I been working all day as your damn valet without a single nap
While you're loading me up with bags and bags of crap
Crap crap crap
There's a happy feeling nothing in the world can match
When I make it to the car with both my arms attached
It'll nearly be like a miracle if I can even drive
This parking lot mess is a stress takes a couple years off our lives
Just see that blizzard blitzing and ice storm spritzing us too
You say that's lovely weather to go shopping together with you
For bankruptcy we're filing and bills are piling up due
Next time I'll sure know better than to "go buy a sweater" with you
But we know that won't stop you; you'll drag me shopping with you
Inside the wives are buying and husbands crying boo-hoo
I'd rather eat yak droppings than to be hat shopping with you
Ring it up! Ring it up! Ring it up! Let's go
It's time for my show
I'm missing an "Alf" rerun, you know
Bag it up! Bag it up! Bag it up! I'm done
This day's as much fun
As standing around while a clown takes a staplegun to my tongue
My wallet's nice and empty but we've got plenty of new
Expensive worthless items the world's been hiding from you
With all these shops before us you'll make us poor as dirt too
Oh God this time's unending I'm spend-spend-spending with you
By the dressing room I find an empty bench at last
I'll be right here checking out some teenage wench's ass
I been working all day as your damn valet without a single nap
While you're loading me up with bags and bags of crap
Crap crap crap
There's a happy feeling nothing in the world can match
When I make it to the car with both my arms attached
It'll nearly be like a miracle if I can even drive
This parking lot mess is a stress takes a couple years off our lives
Just see that blizzard blitzing and ice storm spritzing us too
You say that's lovely weather to go shopping together with you
For bankruptcy we're filing and bills are piling up due
Next time I'll sure know better than to "go buy a sweater" with you
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 5 | 18 | 18 | 18 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
2 Claude Songs In A Day!!!
yes, that, indeed is a very special hell
Awesome.
Very good, Claude, It's all good stuff, but the staplegun line is a classic.
Great stuff, Claude! I especially liked the bench / wench couplet. More than fives.
I don't get it.
A more realistic view of the winter season. You forgot the part about the furnace breaking down. By the way, it was in the 80's on Christmas Eve in Burbank. Wish you were here.
Classic. TMGLTM; not sure why it doesn't have a bazillion votes. It gives me a happy feeling nothing in the world can match.
Here's another 555 to carry around.
[SOTM] Lol, I loved this one! My favorite lines were "This day's as much fun, As standing around while a clown takes a staplegun to my tongue"...Made me laugh a lot! 555!
[SOTM] DKTOS, but I love it. I have to sympathise with you.
(SOTM) How anyone can rate this less than a 555 is beyond my scope of thinking. Excellent, Claude!
(SOTM) Very funny, esp. the staplegun. LOL
SOTM - Already packed you some 5s.
What Spaff said. I was complimenting your work to a friend a while back and mentioned that your genius is making complex parodies look easy. This one's a perfect example. It flows so smoothly that a passive reader will catch the humor but fail to recognize the expert craft and wordplay, especially in the internal rhymes. I could go on and on.
SOTM - This is one of those OS's were parodies of it either dominate or die. The whole meter and trickiness of the whole thing. Well done.
(SOTM) I thought I was dktos at first but due to you nailing all of the internal and end-line rhymes it came back to me immediately. "yak droppings", "staplegun to my tongue" were great, but the "checking out some teenage wench's ass" verse was the best. Very funny. 555.
(SOTM) Loved it! 555!
(SOTM) This is an OS I've been DYING to parody, but have never come up with I good enough idea. And after reading this masterwork, I've now more or less given up hope. Brilliant job, bass turd. :-) 555
(SOTM) You think shopping is bad? Try the returns line. What's good, however, is this parody!
(SOTM) This was as much a pleasure to read the fourth and fifth times as it was the first.
Is this what they call "spending quality time", then?
(sotm) that must be a US Xmas carol, Claude, because I don't know it and I can't source the OS anywhere - so I've had to try to make up a tune so the pacing would work so I could appreciate the lines, which I sort of achieved (loved the internal rhyming) but I still feel I'm missing out on something compared to those who KTOS - but the words were very funny and witty nevertheless
(SOTM) Yeah, this was funny. 555's!
SOTM: I am one of the lucky men who's wife doesn't like to shop (although that means when she does, it's even more difficult). Well done!
(SOTM) DKTOS soz but again ome good lyrics, fomr other peoples views i guess ull have ot have a 555
Thanks everybody
(SOTM) Fantastic --- and "This day's as much fun / As standing around while a clown takes a staplegun to my tongue" made me guffaw out loud, for real!
(SOTM) Very nice!
We gonna shop down to De Saks Fifth Avenue,dont bring Winona Ryder
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