Come 'n listen to my story 'bout a man named Jeb
His big brother George tried to get e-lec-e-ted
But one sad November came a family feud
Cuz Jeb didn't deliver for the bumblin' dude
(George,that is, Dubya, guy with that Texas team)

Flor'da was where Gore wasn't s'posed to have a prayer
The kinfolk said, Jeb, keep him outta there
Said your state is where George has gotta win
So he loaded up the ballots and he called up Kath-er-ine
(Harris, that is, Cruella deVille, scary chick)

Well, we'd like to say goodbye to Jeb and all his kin
They want you folks to know they don't need your votes to win
Cuz after Daddy's buddies made a coupla friendly calls
Those pesky county recounts won't be countin' after all
(All your pregnant chads and dimples and punch cards)

While this story's mighty sorry and you're prob'ly feelin' had
Just be glad you ain't poor Jeb...now that dude's got it bad!
Poor Jeb is stuck in Flor'da in a swamp of innuendo
While his brother's in the White House playin' his Nintendo
(Damn him--I'm the smarter one! And he made Katherine an ambassador...)

Y'all go home now, hear?