STINKHORN FUNGUS:
Is it plausible aliens brung us
That weird life-form called stinkhorn fungus?
I just wish we could ban it,
Send it back to its planet,
But alas it has settled among us.

Nature's nerf-ball, it's named for its stench —
Your eyes water and teeth want to clench.
It's designed, no surprise,
To attract swarms of flies,
To its home near your new garden bench.
(Which could put off a swain or a wench).

BEE STINGS:
For most 'bee stings' the bees take the fall,
Though it isn't the bees' fault at all;
Vespine pests, yellow jackets
Undertake an attack; it's
A typical day's ER call.

EAGLES:
Earl the eaglet ate right in his aerie —
DDT-laden fish made him wary.
The scenario jumps
To our day and our dumps.
Now our Earl is a carnivore scary.

Earl's an emblem resurgent, so regal,
But you'll find you've not much recourse legal,
When, for tastier diet,
He dives in the quiet
And seizes your poodle or beagle.

BEACH EROSION:
From his beach house on Sullivan's isle,
Beau walked seaward at least half a mile,
Where he stated with flourishment,
"Our beach needs no nourishment;
Nearby islands will envy our style."

SUMMER ESCAPES:
So, Algonquin has rock-rimmed blue lakes,
Worth the effort that getting there takes.
Leave the grimy hot city —
Woods and wetlands so pretty,
For our otter-loon-perch summer breaks.

URBAN GREEN SPACES:
You would fret about where canines pee
And go poop if, like me, you're a tree.
Our curbside green zone,
Pesty pets, leave alone!
"Owners, help keep our walks urine-free!"

GEYSERS:
An old Yellowstone Park tour-adviser
Could predict like a geezer much wiser:
"Pressure rises in chasms,
Vapour gushes in spasms —
It's magma's heat driving that geyser."

HURRICANES:
With the Lowcountry right in its path, you
Feared flooding and raging wind's wrath. You
Escaped, it would seem,
Deadly damage extreme —
As when Haiti met hurricane Matthew.