Homer J. the Simpson
Sung to “Barnacle Bill the Sailor”

Who’s that strapping husky man?
Who’s that strapping husky man?
Who’s that strapping husky man?
Asked the girl named Margie

It’s the greatest drunk you’ve ever seen
He’s Homer J. the Simpson
He’s always kind and never mean
He’s Homer J. the Simpson
Every donut runs in fear
When his footsteps mean he’s near
But they’re always chomped, oh dear
By Homer J. the Simpson

But he’s bald and ugly, too
But he’s bald and ugly, too
But he’s bald and ugly, too
Said the sis of Margie

He may have lost all but 3 hairs,
That Homer J. the Simpson
But I don’t think that’s being fair
To Homer J. the Simpson
Sure, he can be loud and crude
And he’ll eat up all your food
But he’s one hilarious dude
He’s Homer J. the Simpson

He’s the one I want to wed
He’s the one I want to wed
He’s the one I want to wed
Crowed the girl named Margie

You could’ve picked a better man
Than Homer J. the Simpson
But your heart shows you’re a fan
Of Homer J. the Simpson
Run to his house immediately
And if he asks “Will you marry me?”
Smile and tell him, “Yes, indeed,”
To Homer J. the Simpson

Now he is my lovely beau
Now he is my lovely beau
Now he is my lovely beau
Cheered the girl named Margie

Now Marge Bouvier is married for life
To Homer J. the Simpson
But that don’t mean there won’t be strife
For her and Homer Simpson
There’ll be fights, and there’ll be scorn
And three little kiddies born
But she’ll love him evening and morn
That Homer J. the Simpson