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Song Parodies -> "The Mad Reichenberg Scheme"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"The Mad Reichenberg Scheme"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

At last- my 500th SJH IPASOY parody!!! As the war was coming to a close, the SS came up with a plan to modify the V-1 flying bomb into a piloted suicide machine known as the Reichenberg IV. It added a rudimentary cockpit below the Argus pulsjet and b/c of reduced fuel (as it would be carried by a He-111 parent aircraft), added more weight to the warhead (1800 lbs vs 1000). It had a range of a mere 155 miles and speed of 400 mph level, higher in the dive. There were plenty of voluteers but the LW was against SO (suicide) use and eventually so were the SS. Even Hitler would not approve of this use despite influence of Hanna Reitsch who flew one herself! So, the Allies found these laying all around Germany in 1945.
The mad Reichenberg scheme
waste of time

Piloted V-1, SS use
Lacked precision
Suicide mission

Heinkle would carry it
Missile would drop down
Piloted 400 (mph) steady
Bail-out before craft impacts the ground

[No ejection seat, plan was unsound]

The mad Reichenberg scheme
waste of time
By ‘45

Not approved
Not approved
Not approved
Not even by Hitler
Recruits to spare
But wasn’t to be
Plan of despair

[It went nowhere]

Lunacy!
The mad Reichenberg scheme
waste of time
(like the SO Bf 109K!)
SO Bf 109K- a suicide tactical atomic bomber that was converted to carry a 880 lb mini-nuke Germany was developing in 1945. The aircraft were converted to carry the single bomb but the atomic bombs for it are in question. When the LW went to pick them up in April 1945 at a SS location, the trucks were turned back by the SS. Did they ever complete them? No one is saying but around the Baltic were several blasts of intense light and strange cloud formations. This could be the firedamp weapon testing, so no one knows for sure. If it was a tactical nuke such info would be classified as Germany would have tested first before the US Trinity Test. Some claim German uranium and fusing was used on that bomb and on Fat Man... Reichenberg IV: http://discaircraft.greyfalcon.us/picturesn/re202.jpg http://discaircraft.greyfalcon.us/picturesn/re201.jpg Trainer version under construction: http://discaircraft.greyfalcon.us/picturesn/re203.jpg

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

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User Comments

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Patrick - November 21, 2012 - Report this comment
How would one bail out of an aircraft when the cockpit was directly in front of the intake for the pulse jet engine? The Japanese didn't seem to have such qualms. Even built a trainer version of the Oka flying bomb. That would have been a weird teacher-student relationship. One does have to wonder though, if von Stauffenberg had been a Muslim instead of a Catholic...
Rob Arndt - November 21, 2012 - Report this comment
That was the problem- since the fuel demand was far less a bigger warhead was fitted and the small cockpit to the rear. Had an ejection seat been installed then the cockpit area would have taken up more room and would have been moved forward, reducing the warhead weight. The R.IV was designed for simplicity and the pilot really could not escape due to the Argus pulsejet above and behind unless the pilot went inverted which would throw the craft off target. A custom down-drop seat could have been installed (like Hitler's aboard his Fw-200) but would have delayed production timing but could only be used in level flight. The Germans had better unmanned flying bombs in development, so they should have just built them instead. Like the Henschel V-4 or aircraft with explosive carriers that had their own jet engines. Alternately, maybe the SO-344 Rammshussjaeger which had a detachable nose warhead projectile!

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