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Song Parodies -> "Cheap Gun-TRW"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Cheap Gun-TRW"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

My 525th SJH IPASOY parody! This one deals with the 1970s requirement for a cheap export alternative rival rifle to the Communist AK-47. Since the M-16, M-14, and M-1s were too complicated and high-maintenance for little-trained foreign troops fighting the spread of communism is SE Asia and ME, the US decided to hire TRW (Thompson Roma Wooldridge) to make a simple and low-maintenance rifle as cheaply as possible for mass-production. TRW specialized in satellite systems but had taken part in National Match contests for firearms up to .50 cal. TRW designed a rifle that looked very much like the WW2 German paratroop FG-42 rifle but using cheap parts and space-age lubricants and sealants for almost no maintenance at all. The rifle was composed of 6 parts: magazine, butt, operating slide group, trigger group, gas plug, and barrel-receiver group. Easy to assemble and disassemble. Barrel was heavily chromed to prevent fouling and corrosion while all the other parts were sprayed with a space-age lubricant. All that was required for any cleaning was water and a soft rag and/or toothbrush. The rifle was standard 5.56x45mm and could take 3 mags of 10, 20, and 30 rds. It weighed 8 lbs loaded and with bayonet was 40" long. It fired full-auto ONLY at 450 rpm which meant it was managable. 500m effective range. Up to 10 prototypes were completed by 1973 but by then the US was removing troops from Vietnam and had surplus rifles already paid-for. So, the TRW LMR was cancelled and most SE nations plus Jordan by '75 had received 162,000 surplus M-16s instead!!!
Cheap gun-TRW
market declined

AK rival for foreign use
Cheap parts buyin’
Full-auto firin’

US couldn’t stand it
No equal gun found
Needed help badly
Hired TRW to bring costs down

[$130 per gun sound]

Cheap gun-TRW
market declined
By ‘75

Made a few
Made a few
Made a few
To fight communism
Low maintenance cares
Took box mags- all 3
Lost its mission

[Surplus arms given]

Was no need
Cheap gun-TRW
market declined
(US gave away 162,000 M-16s- for FREE!)



http://www.guns.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/lmrpart3.jpg http://www.guns.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/TRWLMRexplodedview3.jpg http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tSOffmmyvn0/TVbULcaql0I/AAAAAAAAB6k/zN_fNMQJ3PM/s1600/TRW+LMR.jpg

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   15
 15
 15
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - January 01, 2013 - Report this comment
Truly baffling- a 1-bomb on a US rifle! Or is it simply my posted stat on SJH IPASOY parodies? If so, 1-bomber, could you just skip mine? I write these info-parodies to educate and if you do not like the topic, then rate someone else a high mark for what you DO like. If a military vet and you didn't like the FG-42 comparison- too bad b/c that IS what it resembles even though the internal workings are different. The M-60 MG borrowed from both the FG-42 and MG-42 as well ;-)

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