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Song Parodies -> "Underwater Pistol"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Underwater Pistol"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The Soviet/Russian SPP-1 underwater pistol was relatively unknown until the 1990s along with the rival German HK P-11 underwater psitol. The Soviet design arrived in 1971 a year after the W German weapon in 1970. The SPP-1 fires from a 4-barrel, 2 lb weapon with a rear loading cartridge. The rounds are 4.5x39mm darts, electrically fired. Each trigger pulls fires 1 round in sequence until the cartridge is empty and manually removed. AFAIK, it can be reloaded underwater. Meant to kill enemy divers, the range varied by depth from 6-18m. On land up to 20m. The rival HK P-11 is a 5-barrel weapon that fires 7.62x36mm darts but from a completely sealed frontal unit. After all the rounds are gone the entire unit is removed to be replaced completely. This cannot be done underwater, nor on land by the diver- it must be sent back to the factory for reloading. Not content to just have an underwater pistol the Soviets came up with an underwater AK!!!
Underwater pistol
Russian kind

In ‘71 this type was new
It fires 4 darts
Has waterproof parts

Frogmen had to have it
Covert missions bound
Four-barrel was deadly
At low depths could take divers down

[Rear-loaded direct mag proven sound]

Underwater pistol
Russian kind
Ops fine

Germans too
Germans too
Germans too
HK P-11
Reds unaware
Kept in secrecy
Navies, seven*

[SF heaven]

SPP
Underwater pistol
Russian kind
(Underwater AK followed shortly)

* Germany, UK, France, Italy, US, Nehterlands, and Norway. Later, exported to Israel and Denmark.

SPP-1 pistol: http://www.cruffler.com/Features/NOV-01/4.5mmUnderwater.jpg Underwater AK: http://world.guns.ru/userfiles/images/assault/as69/aps.jpg HK P-11: http://world.guns.ru/userfiles/images/handguns/germany/hg209/1287726817.jpg

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

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Old Man Ribber - January 16, 2013 - Report this comment
Rob - This sounds like it could be from a 1950's low budget black and white sci-fi movie Commies From The Deep. Good work here. By chance, was the Kalashnikov aquatic rifle designated the AK-H2O? ;D
Rob Arndt - January 16, 2013 - Report this comment
The underwater AK from Tula was designated APS (Russian: Underwater Assault Rifle). I did a parody of it for tomorrow!

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