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Song Parodies -> "Female Ace Hidden from View?"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"Female Ace Hidden from View?"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Grunter von Haart (spelling is correct), should be called the top female ace of WW II; in Italy she was accredited with 168 kills, and a possible 39 kills over a nine month engagement. She states: "When in the air, in combat, all I think about is how best to kill the enemy." [See, "Ace of One " by Grunter von Haart, Olympic Press 1968, pages 112 - 113]. By far this women out shines most other fighter pilots in that theater. In 1967, she became a naturalized American Citizen, and died in 1991 at the ripe old age of 96 years*. Her legacy of being called the first female ace in Germany is in concrete as she was awarded the Iron Cross First Class by Hitler himself, in 1943**, and later received a prison sentence by the Americans. So let us heed to her words, written many years after the WW II, "War is an art that all who participate therein shall suffer, given the immensity of the troubled times, one must ask herself not shall I defend my Country, but rather I shall lay my life down so that others may live in peace." [Id. at page 388].
Female ace hidden from view?
Lost in time…???

Grunter von Haart claims that she flew
Was she lyin’?
Or testifyin’?

War fighting? Banned from it
Yet this single account
Dates and places are sketchy
1-6-8 kills in 9 mos wiped out?

[Nazis would not allow word to get out]

Female ace hidden from view?
Was lost in time…???
Since ‘45

Her age skewed
Awards too
Was it true
Her kills and due?
Enemies aware
Of her Bf 109G?
Who did her reviews?

[And who else knew?]

Fantasy?
Female ace hidden from view?
Was lost in time…???
(If true, she puts high Experten in jeopardy)

[Nazis would NOT have celebrated her victories due to ideology]
* Age disputed, she died in 1991 at age 76
** Recied EK1 in 1944 by Hitler, age 29
Note that her vague theater and unit from the book was typical of repentant Nazis in the 1960s when the book was written in German language. Multiple errors are found in the English translation. Her story is not fantasy as even well-known Hanna Reitsch got permission from Hitler to form an all-female fighter unit in March 1945 but rescinded after 18 days. Hanna was preparing a squadron of Reichenberg R.IV suicide pulsejet aircraft and women trained on typical NSFK SG-38 gliders for this mission along with young men. Hanna, although a civilian pilot was attached to the Luftwaffe and many female pilots were used by the LW for ferry flights and transport duties behind their lines. Melitta von Stauffenberg was jumped by an American fighter in April 1945 and died of her wounds later. Hanna flew the Bf 109, Fw-190, Me-262, and Me-328 fighter in addition to the suicide R.IV and many other aircraft and helos. She could have been an Experten easily as evidenced by her descent into Berlin with von Greim in a Fieseler Storch under fire. She set it down with the precision of a helicopter and later took off in an Ar-96.

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Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 8

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User Comments

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Lt. Col. Jackie Cochran - March 28, 2014 - Report this comment
I could fly circles around this Jerry girl. Novel choice of OS.
Rob Arndt - March 28, 2014 - Report this comment
All things being equal, then Hanna Reitsch would have downed Cohran easily in her choice of Bf 109K-4, Fw-190D series, or Me-262 jet! As it was, Lilya (Lidya)Litvak holds the highest female fighter ace score at 12 kills + 2 probable, and 1 balloon for her short career. She was the "White Rose of Stalingrad" who used to fly with flowers in her cockpit. She flew the Yak-1 and Yak-1b. It took 8 Messers to bring her down. She died in an inverted crash... sad. I have her picture on one of my walls- a true hero and Hero of the Soviet Union. The VVS allows women to fly fighters now again and there is a excellent Su-32 Fullback female pilot that struck during the fighting with Georgia many years back. I wrote about her too.
Rob Arndt - March 28, 2014 - Report this comment
Also note that although the Luftwaffe forbid women to fly and fight under the 3Ks (translated Church, Children, and Kitchen) making baby soldiers for the Reich instead, that did not apply to the SS Werwolf program in 1945. One woman reported and guided SS soldiers to the Mayor of Aachen's home and they killed him. She still continued to live there and was proud of what she did. Another female Werwolf in the Soviet Sector of Berlin killed possibly up to 13 Reds using poison, knives, garrote wire, and a SMG. She was executed and left to rot in the rubble for days before buried in an undisclosed grave.
sailer sam - March 30, 2014 - Report this comment
that story was verified as counterfeit years ago. Repeating all these posts from your old 2010 WW11 site is pointless.
Rob Arndt - March 30, 2014 - Report this comment
The story was indeed controversial many years ago, but many believed that the errors were in translation from German to English and it was compared to similar male LW accounts of the 1960s that were vague in nature but true. Hanna's story is certainly true and her formation of the Reichenberg R.IV squads which would include female pilots. Many NSFK female pilot trainers as well as German female ferry pilots already had flying experience and FYI, as fact, many Bf 109 pilots learned technical training from female instructors. Also, Black Sun was not and is not my site- I am hosted there and the owner has tacked-on various stories to my articles as well as other references that I do not necessarily endorse. My texts are unboxed. If I added anything that is in boxed format, my name will be on it. Black Sun is also not a WW2 site, it is a controversy and weird factoid site with many topics. My contributions include(d) disc aircraft, unusual small arms, strange vehicles, female Bundeswehr, WW1 German aircraft, rare aircraft, and 3 Star Wars independent novels. My host rearranged his site many years ago and I left. He cut a lot of my materials and also added a lot of his stuff that is controversial. This account is his addition. AFAIK, from the old forum accounts and talk was that they were trying to verify dates and locations claimed. If there has been a definate change then I welcome you to post the ref and also go to Black Sun Redux and post the same to comments. Another female pilot was trained by her LW b/f on a Me Bf 109G trainer and was claimed to have flown into combat with Mustangs attacking his base. The only thing of that account that seems factual was that she was definately illegally trained and that her LW b/F and her were questioned by authorities and separated. I do not know if she took off or not when she was visiting his base. There are many things about WW2 on all sides that were either exaggerations or outright lies, during and after the war and also seemingly impossible things that proved true. I present all sides and most of the controversial topics. The USAF and US Govt denied for 50 years that the Germans had disc craft and then admitted them in 1995 but presented minimal information- that they were prototypes and highly unstable. No designations, manufacturers, production pics, flight footage, operators, etc... that tech is STILL classified until 2020 by the USAF and the Jonastal S.III complex is classified until 2045 by the AEC!!! Facts are sometimes stranger than fiction. WHY 75-100 yr classifications? And this story is really no different than pilots that fell from the sky at 20,000 ft and survived w/o a parachute, attempts to kill the Royal family with explosive candy bar grenades, the use of dog mines, the MI5 plan to get estrogen into Hitler to feminize him, talking Nazi dogs, the German sub anchor in the Baltic, and I could go on and on... life is weird. Nothing the Germans tried as bizarre seems unrealistic.

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